Needing a Mate
by Kyoshi-Angel of Artisan
Summary: What if life at home isn't all it's cracked up to be after Goku died, leaving one teen to turn to his best friend to get through the ordeal. Chichi bashing and out of character in it, don't like, don't read. PiccoloXGohan Pairing. R&R
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Dragon Ball Z or any of its characters

Different speeches:

"Normal speech"

'_Sarcastic thoughts'_

'_**Mind speech'** _

Chapter One: Gohan's POV

"Gohan hurry up, breakfast is getting cold!" I hate her voice. She thinks she's so smart, that I can't detect the poison in the food that she feeds me just to keep me there. I'm just glad that she hasn't tried that on Goten yet, granted he clings to her so I think he's safe, for now. With a heavy sigh I pull myself out of bed, still dressed in yesterday's cloths trying to fool her that I spent the whole night studying. I grabbed a text book to bring it with me to 'read' as I head downstairs as I ran my free hand through my hair. I said nothing as I took a seat and propped the book up to keep reading. "As much as I love to see you studying Gohan, not at the kitchen table, please" She said with a smiled on her face as she took the text book from me

I ran my hand through my hair again but said nothing. For the last month I've done everything to seem like I'm on her side though I just want to get away from her. "I was thinking that it would be fun if I brought Goten over to Bulma's to play with Trunks while I study that way he has a play mate and doesn't distract me, while you'd out shopping today" I said '_sweetly_' though it made me feel sick say it, though I was desperately hoping it would get me out of the house and her control with Goten.

"Good Idea my little scholar. After breakfast I'll get Goten ready for you to take to Bulma's while you get ready." she said sweetly. I forced myself to smiled back as I eat, glad that there was little to no poison in the food this morning. After getting a plate down I excused myself from the table to go get ready, grabbing the text book as I went.

Once back in my room I got changed into a faded blue jeans and a black t-shirt. I grabbed a back pack and put my folded up Gi up and putting it in the bottom of the bag and put the text books on top of it, hiding it from '_mother's_' eyes. I styled my short hair into spikes. _**'Hey Vegeta...Goten and I are on our way over...I need to talk to you when I get there' **_I said mentally to him. I love that fact that I was telepathic I could talk to the team without her knowing it. It was the only thing keeping me sane since dad's murder at Cell's hands, forced upon him by me. Even if they didn't know how bad it got here some days. Grabbing my bag I headed down stairs to met them, I managed to hold a smiled the hold time I was with her.

"I'll drive you boys there, that way you can study on your way there Gohan." she said. I fallowed her '_order_' and got into the front passenger seat. While she bucked Goten into the booster seat in the back, I pulled out a notebook and the biology text book. I set it up where the text book was propped up on the dash so I could write and read at the same time, taking notes. The whole three hour drive I went through the evolution of plate cells to their current forms and into reproduction chapter of the text book. At the moment I was glad that there was a notebook on my lap, so that she couldn't learn that reading about an erect penis and seeing the pictures of then were getting me aroused.

I felt the car slow before I looked up to see we were at Bulma's. I packed up my bag again while '_mother_' got Goten out of the backseat of the car. I got out and headed for the door smiling warmly at Bulma who was waiting at the door for us. "Wow look at you Gohan, your getting so tall, what happened to the little boy I use to know?" she asked before she hugged me. I blushed and held her back quickly.

"You should see how much Goten's grown since you last saw him." I laughed as she let me go and walked over to '_mother_' and Goten. I headed inside to the kitchen and got myself a cup of coffee before sitting down at the table with a text book to read while Bulma and '_mother_' came into the kitchen to catch up. They ignored me and the sounds of Goten and Trunks banging things around upstairs as they played.

'_**Piccolo...can you hear me?'**_ I asked in my mind needing someone to talk to at the moment. _**'I'm not interrupting your training am I?'**_ I couldn't help but to ask rate after the first question. I didn't want to be a burden to him. It's why I rarely talk to him mentally it kinda halts his training to talk back to me.

'_**I can hear you Gohan, nor are you interrupting. What's up kid?' **_I heard his voice, I forced myself not so show a smile that wanted to break out from hearing his deep voice that brought so much comfort to my troubled soul.

'_**um...Piccolo, what would you do if you knew someone was doing something bad but you didn't know how to stop it?'**_ I found myself asking before I could stop myself.

'_**Gohan stop trying to hide information from me'**_ he growled back causing my blood to burn through my body, as my pants started to get tighter. I grabbed the cup of coffee and took a drink trying to make it look like I was still studying. _**'Gohan start talking, I know damn well you can hear me'**_ I wanted to moan just hearing his voice even though it was laced with anger and concern. I hated myself for being so weak when it came to being around the man who trained me.

'_**I can't stay with harpy anymore Piccolo... I can't take her being so controlling, she poison's the food...I would have left by now if it wasn't for Goten...I just don't know what to do anymore'**_ I filled him in one of my biggest secrets I was hiding from everyone one and only told to the journal that I kept. I heard his growl ring out in my head. _**'I'll let you know when she leaves. I managed to talk her into bring me and Goten to Bulma's' **_I said but it was too late he had already teleported to the same room that Vegeta was in. I knew that they were talking and possible using the other as a way to release their anger so they wouldn't kill the woman if they saw her. I jumped feeling someone put a hand on my shoulder and kiss my head.

"I'm so proud of you Gohan, I'm heading out now, I'll see you in a few hours." I smiled and nod to her before going back to the text book once I heard the door open and close I laid my head down on the table as Vegeta and Piccolo came out from the training room. I sighed and got up refilling my coffee cup, giving myself something to do so I wouldn't have to look at their angry faces.

"What the Hell Gohan? Why the hell are you letting that harpy get away with shit like that?" I heard Vegeta growl out with pure anger and hate for the woman. I bowed my head. I knew I shouldn't have said anything. I heard Bulma coming back towards the room.

"What do you want me to do Vegeta? Abandon my brother with her to get away from her abuse? Or take way the last parent that boy has left because of my mistake fighting Cell?" I asked feeling my anger rise but it wasn't at them or even at '_mother_' it was directed at myself for being weak and pathetic. "Oh just forget I ever said a thing about it" I growled out unable to stop myself as I took my seat again holding the coffee cup and stared at the book. I noticed a green hand closed the book on me and took it away along with the backpack.

"Gohan forgetting about it isn't going to solve the problem and I know you know that damn well know it." Piccolo growled. I knew he was watching me closely. I sighed trying to control my body's reaction to the man standing across from me. I couldn't bring myself to look at my best friend and trainer, as the feelings of shame bubbled up in me for my perverted thoughts and feelings about him.

"What the hell do you want me to do? Answer me that Piccolo. Today's the first time in years that I haven't had to deal with being poisoned three times a day every day. If I kill her, Goten will grow up without either parent because of me. I can't live with myself if I did that to him. Hell I can barely stand living with myself for getting dad killed in that fight with Cell and every day I'm reminded of my mistake." I snapped back at him. My eyes locked onto his black, soul pricing eyes that I could swear could see down into my soul. I noticed the concern in their depths and it hurt but I couldn't look away from his eyes that I haven't seen in four years. I could see he was trying to find something to say to me to comfort me or calm me down but I knew that words alluded him.

"You already did what you had to do Gohan, you told someone. Come on. I need a blood sample to get proof that she's poisoned you then I'll take it to court and get both you and Goten protected from her." Bulma said. I didn't fight her as she pulled me to my feet and dragged me off to the medical bay that she ran. I fallowed her but I still didn't look away from piccolo's eyes till she pulled me around the corner and down the hall. She sat me on the medical table and tied a rubber band around my arm before putting the needle into my arm, drawing the blood.

"Hey Bulma...Can Goten stay here with you, Vegeta and Trunks after the court thing? I want him to be happy and the best place that he'll be happy is here." I asked trying to find a place where my brother will be happy. It didn't matter where I was, just as long as my brother was taken care of was all that mattered.

"Of course but what about you Gohan where are you going to stay?"She asked me and I shrugged.

"Maybe on the lookout or out in the woods for a few years, I don't know. I have stuff to work out on my own." I said bowing my head as Bulma pulled the needle out and got me to hold the cotton ball to the small wound. I don't know if I could bring myself to tell her that I might be attracted to men over women so I just left it the way it was. "So when will the test be done?" I asked trying to change to the topic before she could ask anything.

"In about twenty" She said, I nodded as I got up to leave the room. I walked back to the Kitchen hearing Piccolo saying something softly. I stopped to listen just around the corner before entering the kitchen.

"Last night I had a dream that made me question something about myself. The dream started off with me standing on the edge of a cliff staring up at the stars before feeling a pair of arms wrap around me, pulling me towards a pool of warmth. I can't help the smile that spreads across my face and my blood from burning through my body. Breathing in the earthly scent of a desert and rain that's warped around me, pulling forth a moan from my parted lips; causing me to know who's holding me.

I know it's wrong but I couldn't stop myself from turning in the hold and looking up into their dark eyes that inched ever closer to me. Everything slowed down as a pair of lips touched mine causing me to gasp and cling to him, not wanting to lose the feelings he caused in me or the feelings of being needed for once. I felt myself-" he stopped reading as I walked into to the room. I glared at the book he was reading.

"Good to know that my journal entries entertain you guys, don't let me stop you, I just came to get my coffee and text books to go back to studying" I said coldly. I knew what entry Piccolo was reading. It was the one I wrote last year after the dream I had about him pinning me to the ground, making love to me. I had woken up that morning moaning his name into my pillow as I came for the first time in my life on my sheets. At the moment I was glad I wrote that entry so vague when it came to who it was I dreamt of.

"Gohan who is he?" I heard Piccolo asked and I froze not looking at them. The shock in Piccolo's voice was clearer then the passage he read. Looking at him I noticed how pale he was. I took the book form him.

"Does it matter it was one messed up dream that meant nothing." I said looking away from the two men and headed outside. I sat at the patio chair I put my bag on the ground along with all the books but my journal that they we're just reading. I glared at the leather bound book wanting to get rid of it but unable to bring myself to do so.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two: Piccolo's POV

I knew I shouldn't have read anything from the leather bounded book or give into Vegeta's demand to even look in it. The hurt and shame in his eyes when he took the book back was clear that he wasn't ready to share what was in the book and that whatever was in it brought him great shame. So much so that he couldn't tell anyone about it. _**'Gohan...I'm sorry...I shouldn't have betrayed your trust and read your journal on you or give into Vegeta's promptings to'**_ I said hoping he could hear me and would talk back to me. I knew he was stressed about something but what it was I'm not really sure.

'_**It's fine, don't worry about it, you didn't know it was my journal till after I said something about it' **_he said back but the pain was clear in his voice that it had really hurt the boy and yet his energy was so erratic that it worried me that there was really something wrong with him. I was about to ask Vegeta to explain more about the saiyan race when Bulma walked into the room.

"For Dende's sake, I'm surprised that boy can even wake up let alone move..." Bulma said to herself as she looked over the page in her hand. Both Vegeta and I looked at her waiting for her to fill us in on what's wrong with Gohan. "He has enough tranquilizers in his system to kill a horse, not to mention the morphine, oxicoatin, and other house hold poison's floating in his blood. I also a DNA scan on the blood and there was something that didn't really look right so I compared it to Trunks', Goten's and Vegeta's blood and noticed it was in Goten's and Vegeta blood as well. Want to fill us in on what it might be Vegeta?" She asked. I didn't know what to say as I took the sheet from her hand to look it over. The test didn't lie he had enough poison in his system to kill a small army.

"So their transfer male's like I am, what's the problem?" he asked forgetting that we had no idea what he was talking. He sighed noticing the question looks we were giving him. "On Planet Vegeta, it was rare for females to be born, so much so that for every one female that was born there where twenty male's. The race evolved with a sub male class know as the transfer males. They like females can carry children to full term and birth them however transfer males can also increase the power of the male their mated to but mating was rarely done on Planet Vegeta since it could kill both side just to perform the mating ritual." He said like it was no big deal. Bulma looked pale as she took a seat trying to let it all soak in. I left the page on the table before getting up and heading outside.

I stood by the now closed back door watching Gohan feverishly write in the leather bounded book. I walked over to the other chair and sat down to meditate what he wrote. I didn't bother to ask him what he was writing. "I guess you think I'm a freak now..." he asked softly. I didn't think he could hear us then I noticed the window was open and the kitchen was next to the room with the open window. We could clearly hear Bulma and Vegeta talk about the news he just shared.

"You're not a freak Gohan. If you where what would that make me?" I asked logically. He couldn't help that his father was an alien any more then I could help being one. I felt his eyes on me. I always knew because whatever part of my body he was looking at it felt an electrical current running through it. I couldn't describe how it made me really feel about it just that I wanted more of it though I knew it was a line that I shouldn't cross with Gohan, even if he's only four years younger than me.

"A hero, someone to be admired and worshiped for all the things you've done for this planet" he whispered as his eyes left me. I opened my eyes to look at him. I never told him that it was something that I wanted even when I was the Demon king; to be admired and worshiped not feared and obeyed through that fear. He sounded so sincere about it and yet it hurt him so much to say it.

"Gohan, who was it that you dreamt of that night, obviously it's bugging you even now. I promise I won't laugh or think of you any differently." I said, causing a tear to fall from his eye that was almost covered by his hair. I reached over to wipe the tear away. I wasn't big on showing affection but at the moment the boy needed someone to show him that he was needed as more than a tool to blame Goku's death on.

"It was you I dreamt of; who pinned me to the earth and made love to me in that dream. I woke up nearly screaming your name that morning not wanting it to end and yeah I lied when I said it meant nothing to me..." he whispered as he pulled away from my hand as if it hurt him to be touched by me. Now I knew why it hurt him to hear me said I wouldn't think differently of him, he wanted me to. He wanted me to be in love with him and to take his loneliness away. I didn't know what to say. He was my first real friend and only now; after 11 years of knowing the kid and watching him grow up did it take me to admit that. I don't even know if I'm capable of the love he wanted from me.

"Gohan...I-"

"Don't, please. I know what you're going to say. That you think as me as a friend; as one of you only friends but you don't love me and even if you did it would be wrong for a teacher to be with their student. I get it, it's all I've thought about for a year now." He took the words from my mouth. I didn't say anything to him. I couldn't. I didn't know how to. I just closed my eyes and tried to meditate as the boy did whatever it was that took his mind off what we were just talking about.

Meditation eluded me though. I couldn't take my mind off the part of the entry I read. I wanted to know how his dream went. I also wanted to know what it was like to have him moan out my name in pure bliss. Shaking my head, trying to clear the thoughts from my head, I opened my eyes to notice that he was holding the leather bound book towards me open. I took it and noticed it was the page I have been readying before he took it from me. He nodded at me to keep reading but not aloud. I nodded back and looked at the page as if to remember it so that it could last me a life time.

**Last night I had a dream that made me question something about myself. The dream started off with me standing on the edge of a cliff staring up at the stars before feeling a pair of arms wrap around me, pulling me towards a pool of warmth. I can't help the smile that spreads across my face and my blood from burning through my body. Breathing in the earthly scent of a desert and rain that's warped around me, pulling forth a moan from my parted lips; causing me to know who's holding me. **

**I know it's wrong but I couldn't stop myself from turning in the hold and looking up into their dark eyes that inched ever closer to me. Everything slowed down as a pair of lips touched mine causing me to gasp and cling to him, not wanting to lose the feelings he caused in me or the feelings of being needed for once. I felt myself reach up and cup both sides of his face as he slowly laid me back onto the ground without breaking the mind numbing kiss. A faint whimper of disappointment rang out only to get a chuckle from him as he broke the kiss.**

**In the moon light he looked like a shadow though I knew he wasn't one. The feel of his strong hands gently removed my hands from him, pinning them effortlessly above my head with one hand. As he kissed his way from my lips down my chin to my neck favouring my left side at the spot where my neck met my shoulder, I never knew how much that one point would arouse me, leaving me unable to form a thought let alone do anything besides moan beneath him, withering in pleasure. I arched into him as his teeth scrapped along the spot, causing our arousals brush together gaining a growl of approval from him that set my blood on fire. All I could think about is getting us out of our cloths and getting closer to him. **

**Before I knew that happened his shirt was off and tied around my wrists keeping them from moving without him knowing it. he tore open my shirt before exploring my bare chest, his chest brushed against my stomach so lightly that I wasn't sure that he even toughed me beside's were his mouth was latched onto one of my nipples sucking on it and nipping at it causing it to pebble under his administrations on the tender flesh before repeating the actions to the other one.**

**I heard a voice begging for more. It was deep and full of lust but in a way I knew it was coming from me. He smirked against my skin before he pulled the pants off my body, giving him a full view of my body. I shivered as I felt him look over my body, my cheeks heated up. I started to doubt that I could bring him pleasure. The thought left me as I felt a large rough hand wrap around my weeping member and pumped it once causing me to scream his name and gaining another growl of approval from him that only added to the delirious pleasure flowing though my body. **

**I felt him put three fingers in my mouth and told me to suck them. I did as he ask only I took it upon myself to suck them as if I was sucking his member. I felt dizzy and the yet my body felt like it was going to explode. Just before it could happen he left go of my member and removed his fingers. I whimpered shaking my head trying to cool my body down but hearing his chuckle only made me burn hotter. I felt his lips press against mine as one of the wet finger pushing into my body. It didn't hurt but it was uncomfortable. I heard him whispered something in my ear but I didn't hear what he said. I just felt his finger mimicking intercourse before a second finger joined the first bringing slight pain that caused me to gasp into the kiss.**

**He moved back to the spot on my neck as his hand wrapped around my member again pumping it. I didn't even notice that he had added the third finger. I felt like I was going to explode again when he pulled his fingers out of me and let go of my member leaving me whimpering in near blinding bliss and pain for being held on the brink for so long. I couldn't stop him from rolling me over on to my stomach then pulled my hips up and back so that I was resting on my knees and forearms. He spread my legs apart. I felt the thick head of his member brush against my entrance as he leaned over me whispering into my ear again. I felt him hold my hips up as he slowly pushing into my body. The pain was so intense that I ended up biting into my left arm to keep from screaming from the pain and yet in some twisted way it felt so good, so...right. He didn't take time to pause for me to get use to the feel but it was a slow light tempo that was set. Slowly the pain subsided and he increased the tempo and intensity of the pace increased. **

**I couldn't stop myself from moaning and making all sorts of noises but they all seem to fail in comparison to the noise I made what he hit something inside of me that made everything I felt this far seem like it was nothing. As he hit it again he grabbed my member and started to pumping it again in time with his thrust. It only to two more of his thrust before I was on the brink of exploding when he bit into my neck causing both our bodies over the brinks. Before I could find out what happened in the dream I had woken up, moaning his name into the pillow trying to muffle the sound as I came over the sheets and my stomach. I laid there for close to an hour trying to calm my body down and regain my mind from the dream, even though it depressed me, knowing it was just a dream of a forbidden love that could never be.**

I didn't know what to say. I felt so hot and yet when the breeze picked up, it felt so cold against my skin. I closed the book and looked over at Gohan who didn't move. I wasn't sure he was even breathing. "Gohan..." he tensed. I knew why, my voice was so airy that it almost sounded like I had growled. I didn't know how much it affected him till I read it in his journal. "I'm sorry; I can't give you what you need. As you put it, it's a forbidden love, it would be best if you put it behind you and move on with your life." I said to him as I put the journal in his hands before I head back into the house, stealing myself, knowing that I broke his heart and the tears that had slipped from his eyes. It felt like my own heart break with his as I walked away from him and what could have been between us.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three: Gohan's POV

I saw the regret in his eyes, as he told me to get over him, before leaving me alone once more. I couldn't bring myself to breath; my heart hurt so much that I couldn't pull in a breath into my lungs. My eyes began to sting then hot tears rolled down my face. It had been four years since I last cried. I thought my eyes had dried up forever after losing Dad and 16 to Cell but I was wrong, I was so very wrong about it. Losing Piccolo made the tears pour forth from my eyes so hot and fast that it stung so badly. I felt like curling up and dying at the moment after having the man I've love my whole life reject me though at it wasn't as bad as it could have been. I felt sick with myself for saying anything to him or even bringing the stupid journal with me. In a fit of rage and pain I through the book to the other side of the year growling at it before breaking down and crying into the chair, wondering just how much worse my life could get.

"Gohan, sweetie; what's wrong?" I heard Bulma ask as she came out to check on me. I didn't answer. I couldn't talk. I tried and ended up nearly screaming in pain. I flinched away from her hand as they tried to rub my back. I shook my head trying to stop the tears but I couldn't. "Did Piccolo hurt you?" she asked wearily. I shook my head so hard to her question that I could see stars. Piccolo could never hurt me, I was the one who hurt him and possibly destroyed only of the only true friendships I had in my life.

"I hurt him Bulma...I told him how I felt about him and it hurt him...I made him hate me" I whispered hoarsely out around the lump in my throat before a new wave of pain raced through me. I didn't know how long I laid there in pain or know if I fell asleep all I knew that happened next was seeing Chichi walking outside with a plate of food and a glare of her face.

"I know you told them Gohan but they can't prove I fed it to you, it's your word against mine and who are they going to believe; a honest hard working mother of two or a depressed teen who wants to die" she hissed at me putting the plate down beside me. I didn't move to touch the food or look at her. I just stared numbly at the other side of the back deck. I lost hope during some point during the toime I laid here. The moment I get home with that woman, I'm never going to be able to get away from her, I felt it in the core of my heart and soul. I knew the man I loved was a demon king and yet it was my own '_Mother_' who I feared more than anything else in the universe and that was saying something. I had feared Frieza and still have nightmares about Broly and Cell but the terror that Chichi brought to my heart went unrivalled. I wanted to reach out for help, to Piccolo or the others but I knew they wouldn't listen to me. Why would they, I was a depressed mess of the boy that I once was.

"You need to eat kid" I heard Vegeta say as he came outside with Goten and Trunks. I didn't move to acknowledge that I heard him. Slowly I forced myself to sit up, even though I couldn't feel anything besides the heaviness in my body.

"What happened to the transfer males if they didn't mate?" I asked hearing how cold and distant it was. It really didn't sound like me and I notice Vegeta flinched at the sound and looked at me more closely.

"Or sleep around you mean. They would die slowly. Like I said mating was rare on Planet Vegeta so there was a lot of sleeping around. I only known about three recorded deaths of transfer that died that way; is when their closest partner was killed in combat and they refused to move on with their lives." He said. I nodded as I forced myself to stand up, bring the plate with me as I walked into the house leaving the plate in the kitchen I walked towards the training room and noticed Piccolo meditating. I stopped not sure what to do. I was about to turn to leave him be, when his eyes open and caught me.

"Sorry Piccolo, I didn't mean to disturb you" I said bowing to him before walking away once he wasn't in site I ran. I grabbed my backpack and journal from the other side of the yard before teleporting to my room. I locked myself in it and drew the curtains closed for the first time in my life that I could remember. I knew that it wouldn't really stop anyone if they really wanted to get to me but it was the only thing that brought comfort to my tormented soul.

'_**Gohan...'**_ I heard Piccolo called out, worried laced in that deep rich voice that was the cause of both my pleasure and my deepest pain. I knew he wanted to make sure I was okay but I couldn't do it. He wanted me to get over him, the only way I could do that was to make a clean break from the man even though it felt like it was killing me to do so.

'_**I'm sorry my king but the only way do to as you ask is to make a clean break...'**_ I whispered so softly in my mind that I wasn't sure I heard it myself or not. I didn't hear anything back and I sighed as I pulled everything in my room that reminded me of Piccolo, stored it in a box and hid it in the space between the ceiling of the floor below and the floor boards in my room. After I got the floor boards back into their resting place, I laid on my bed staring in the darkness for hours till I heard the door open and slam shut. The stomping on the stairs told me that Chichi had come home alone letting Goten sleepover at Bulma's for once bring a small smile to my lips that was as hallow as I felt. She tried to open the door to my room only to find it locked.

"Gohan you open this door rate now or else." She seethed out with venom in the tone. I didn't say anything as I got up and opened the door. I was walking back to my bed when pain erupted in my right shoulder. It burned like so bad that I didn't know what happened. I turned to look at her only to notice the knife just milliseconds before it cut into my side. She left it there as I feel to my knees in pain. "You know you deserve this for murdering your father and for breathing a word about this to those morons" she hissed out. I couldn't bring myself to flinch. I closed my eyes trying to block out the pain. This was the first time I could ever remember her ever physically abusive to anyone and yet I couldn't bring myself to kill her for hurting me even though I should have fought back against her doing this.

I heard her walk around me and towards the bed. My eyes snapped open remembering that I have left my journal on the bed. I tried to get to it before she did only to have her kick me in the face sending me to land on my side, driving the knife further into my side causing me to scream. She sat on my bed reading my entries from the past year learning about everything that I've hid from her. About possibility of being gay, about being telepathic and about where I was hiding the evidence that could be used against her in court if it ever got there. The whole time she tisk-ed till she got to the entry about the dream I had about Piccolo and she turned red, as she dropped the book on the ground.

"No son of mine is going to be gay." She said walking towards me, I tied to back away from her but I couldn't bring myself to move back more than a few inches before she straddled, me keeping me in place. "If I so much as get the hint that you're giving into your perverseness, I'll kill Goten before your eyes and use your hands to do it. Do I make myself clear, you pathetic fagot?" she asked ripping the knife out of my side and held it to my throat.

"y-yes" I choked out through the pain and nausea that rose though my body to have her straddling me. She stood up and kicked my wounded side before she walked out of the room. Closing the door behind her, I listened as she walked back down stairs like nothing had happened. As I lay on the floor in the growing pool of blood that was forming around me, I tensed hearing her coming back up stairs whistling.

"Get yourself and this room cleaned up before morning when I leave to get your brother." She said with such venom that I feared she was going to hit me again. When she left the room, was when I took the time to notice what she brought up with her; the first aid kit and a bucket of soapy water with a rage hanging over the edge of the red plastic. I pulled my shirt off and ripped it into long strips. I used the sleeves to lay against the wound to absorb the blood and the strips to keep it in place. I couldn't reach the wound on my shoulder so I just left it hoping, my body could heal it quickly before I bleed out from the wounds.

Even though I felt cold and dizzy, I stick my hand with the rag into the icy water and rang it out before getting to work on cleaning up the blood that was covering the floor of my room. I spent half the night on my hands and knees making sure there weren't any spots that I missed on my floor. Tossing the rage into the bucket, I dried my hands off on my pants before walking over to my bed and sat on it picking up the book. I noticed the blood spots on the pages I grabbed a pen and opened it to the page that was just after my entry from the day before.

**In what is going to be my last entry onto any journal or dairy or whatever you want to call it? I'm writing it so that maybe if someone finds it, that they could do what I couldn't. The blood on these pages is mine after being stabbed by my mother in my side and the back of my right shoulder. It's no longer safe to keep this around or use any of my gifts to keep sane in this hell that I endure for getting father killed. It's the only way I can protect Goten now, even if I have to lose myself to do it. I pray for mercy on my soul to endure this with grace. I swear to myself that no matter how much it hurts to go through with it, and betray myself, I'll date women so that she can't hurt Goten, because I messed something up. Or let her kill my brother using my hand**

**Piccolo where ever you are and no matter what you do, know that I love you and that my heart and soul, has been and always will belong to you even if you can never love me back the way I love you. I wish that I die they way Vegeta said transfer saiyan's die. I can't bring myself to love another. Even though it's forbidden love, I rather take that and knew what happiness is even if it's short then have a lifetime of unhappiness. **

Closing the book I felt a tear roll down my cheek as I silently opened my bedroom window and slipped out it taking off into the night sky towards the water fall and lake that Piccolo and I once trained at. I landed harder than I thought I would, thanks to the blood lost. I walked towards the waterfall and the cave that lay behind it. Once I got into to the slick, rocky path to get to the cave. It was a slow go to get into the cave that was dry. I walked to the back of the cave and put the book on top of the rock ledge that was there, before falling to the ground. I laid there panting trying to get the dizziness to fade away. It did so slowly only to be replaced with numbing darkness as my eyes slid shut.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four: Chi-chi's POV

I dropped the knife into the sink, shaking from the adrenalin rushing through me. Part of me knew it was wrong to hurt him but I don't really care anymore really about him. How could I? He's so much like his father that I can't handle it anymore. I know it's sick of my to even think it, let alone agree with it but I hate what he is, what they are.

I knew Goku was different from the first day I met him. He wasn't like the other boys I had met in my father's Kingdom and it's why I set my heart on marring him; so that I alone could have the rare and precious boy all to myself. I knew it was wrong of me to trap the man thinking I could cage him forever or have him to myself for the rest of our lives. Wouldn't you know it, after the first night we had sex we ever had, I got pregnant with Gohan.

It's when I got the idea to start poisoning the food. I never wanted a child. They would only get in the way of what I wanted; Goku, alone. It didn't work to say the least. When my back was turned Goku must have switched our plates without me noticing. He ate the poison instead of me, that's when I learned that it could keep him here with me, hidden away in his little home in the forest, no one to disturb us really. So I gave him what he wanted, the child but took his health away from him by feeding him the poison slowly increasing the amount I put in it so that he wouldn't feel like going out to train or to go met his friends, leaving me alone.

After Gohan was born Goku was so happy and cuddly with the boy that I became the afterthought in my husband's eyes to my own child. I guess that looking back at it, I guess one could say I always hated the boy, was jealous of him and it grew everyday from the day he was born. For over four bloody years I listen to the man I worshiped and adore, talk about wanting Gohan to train to be a fighter like him and go on amazing adventures, making new and exciting friends along the way, like he use to do before I tricked him into marring me, caging him in his own house. I always manage to talk him out of it saying how great of a scholar Gohan was going to be and that we should get him into the most advance schools we could find. Being honest with myself I was doing it to get rid of the boy.

Making a deal with Goku that he could take Gohan to met his friends if he got serious about sending Gohan off the private schools to study, only really seeing him for two or three months out of the year. It was a decision that I would regret and enjoy all at the same time. Hours after I watched the pair leave there was a knock on the door. Opening it there stood Krillen looking nervous my heart sank thinking that Goku had sent him to tell me that he was leaving me to go on some adventure with that damn Bulma.

"Ah, h-hi Chi-chi, Master Roshi and the others sent me to inform you that Goku was killing in a combat today. He died saving the earth. Piccolo took Gohan before we could stop him saying something about training the boy to fight." He said so nervously and he had a right to be. I didn't care what happened to Gohan but Goku's death shook me to the core. I couldn't stop the screams of horror and pain the ripped through my soul knowing that I had lost my precious Goku, all because I wanted to get rid of the boy.

That year went by so fast and yet it felt like it have been a life time since I last saw Goku. Thats when I got the call from Bulma, telling me to meet them at the hospital in the nearby city, where they were bringing Goku and Gohan to have their injuries checked out. Slamming the phone into the receiver; grabbing my keys to the car as I rushed out of the house to go see my Goku once again. Upon my arrival there I notice Bulma I walked up to her and before I could say anything she turned and lead me to the room where Goku was laying on the bed in a full body cast, my heart soared hoping that he was paralyzed so that I could look after him. I forced myself to worry about the boy sitting on the other bed with his arm in a cast and Band-Aids on his cheeks. I played up how worried I was about the boy, to keep up the appearance that I loved the boy as much as Goku even though deep in my heart, I knew that he saw through the act, though he didn't say a word about it.

I was glad when Gohan volunteered to go to Namek, it was giving me what I wanted, to be alone with Goku. He was doing it to bring back the man that kidnapped him for a year, as if that man was Gohan's friend, the only friend that boy needed was the text books I got for him to study with. If I was going have to keep him then he could at least make himself useful, get rich and take care of me and his father. That whole month that was spent between Gohan's leaving and Goku's departure was so blissful on my end that made me wish with all my heart, that Gohan was never born.

The day after Goku had left, I demanded that another ship was to be made so that I could fallow after Goku, though I said it was so that I could protect my baby boy. Before the ship was even finished, everyone plus that stupid race that Piccolo belonged to appeared on earth. We got the call from that damn woman saying they were back and where to meet them. I let the others go collect them so I could rush home and start dinner. It wasn't long after I got home that the door opened.

Smiling I turned around expecting to see Goku walking into our home but seeing only Gohan standing there, my smile fell, replaced by a frown. I remember hearing him say that Goku was alive but he didn't want to come back to come home yet. I slapped him for saying it. I didn't want to hear it. That Goku didn't want to come home to me because I didn't want children, just him. I apologised trying to keep the charade up just encase Goku came back. I didn't want to disappoint him, by 'hurting' his precious Gohan. Over the two years, we saw each other but we rarely interacted.

What was the point of telling him to study when he would sneak out the window to go to that green skin demon? Instead I went out to the city and met a man, Rick. We hit it off, though I couldn't love him, when all I wanted was Goku but since I couldn't have what I wanted, I took what was available to me. He would be my lover for years to come and still was even to this day, I still saw Rick for out meetings at his office for a quickie before lunch or maybe in a hotel that he would pick.

The day Goku got back from his 'trip' he confronted me about sleeping around behind his back, that he could smell the other man on me and yet he still forgave me and took me back into his arms. Over the next three years I got so little attention that I went back to sleeping with Rick to get back at Goku but I got smart and always washed up after our sessions and got my tubes tied so that I couldn't have any more children, even though I never told either man about getting it done.

I was lucky that while I was healing Goku had come down with a heart problem and Rick was away on business for a month and a half. The thought of losing Goku again grew with every hour that he laid ill on our bed. I didn't even care that Gohan was still out somewhere fighting the androids. Like I said my world was all about Goku, the kid was just in the way. Fear grew in me and I hated that I was helpless to save the man I loved and yet he had the cure to the illness. I remember spending hours sitting beside him praying to the gods to let me keep my Goku and to take my son from me. I was so happy that clinging to Goku for a week while he was getting over the heart problem, doing whatever he wanted, even if it meant being in the same room as the boy.

The last night that Goku and I slept together was the night before they left to go fight Cell. He promised that he was going to return to me. That no one was going to die in the fight. He was wrong. That boy that he helped train and wanted killed him in cold blood, taking my Goku away from me permanently. After that point I didn't care about Gohan or anything really. Then I got the news, I was pregnant and eight months later I gave birth to Goten; my sweet little baby boy. I fell in love with the boy the moment I saw him. He was my personal little copy of Goku.

I sighed looking back down at the bloody knife laying in the sink. It's why I couldn't have Gohan ruining everything and taking away something else that was mine away from me like he took Goku away from me. I also knew that he would do everything in his power to protect the boy; giving me control of the monster that I birthed fifteen years ago. As I washed the knife I stated to think back to that last night with Goku.

~ Flash Back ~

I looked up at my sweet angel as he pulled himself out of me and rolled onto his back tiredly. I smiled and giggled as I curled into his side. He laid there panting for a few moments before getting up and walking towards the shower. "Goku sweetie, what's wrong? Come back to bed. You still need to rest" I said as I sat up watching his back. He stopped in the door way of our private washroom.

"What we just did...it was a mistake. It's not really me that you think off when we have sex. All you can see is that other guy. It's fine with me because I'm not really thinking of you during the act anymore Chi-chi. You deserve happiness Chichi and clearly your not happy here, I just hope that he can give you what you want since I can't." I heard him say. I gasped. He didn't turn to look at me. Even when I was with Rick all I could think about, that could make me wet was this handsome man standing before me and here he was saying that he was thinking of another while we made love. It crushed me to the core. I didn't know what to do or say for a moment then the though popped into my head that it was that bloody Bulma stepping into a place where she's not welcome.

"W-who is she Goku? Who's this girl that stole your heart?" I seethed softly so not the wake the boy in the other room. Nor did I want to show Goku how pissed it made me just thinking about him laying in bed with Bulma.

"It's not a she, it's Vegeta that consumes my thoughts, that arouses me, not you. How could you after you continue to sleep with that other man? At l mean something to him even if he doesn't love me back, I'm fine with it." I could believe what I was hearing. I thought my mind was playing tricks on me as he walked into the washroom and shut the door behind him to shower. I didn't move. How could I? My Goku had just admitted to loving another man.

~ Flash Back Ends ~

I stabbed the knife into the wooden cutting board. Like the saying goes; like father, like son. I refuse to let that sickness be passed onto my sweet, innocent little Goten, even if it means killing Gohan to protect him. Goten's what is left of my once perfect world and I'll be damned if I let him grow up to be gay. Tiredly I turned on my heels and walked back up the stairs to go to bed. I stopped just outside Gohan's room noticing the light was still on. I opened the door, poking my head into the room. In the middle of the floor the bucket full of red water and first aid kit laid, the floor was clean and the window open, with no Gohan in sight.

I slammed the door so hard that it crack the doorframe. I hated him leaving the house though that god damn window. I walked into my room closing the door softly before skinning into the bed where Goku used to sleep screaming to the gods my frustrations, hurt and pain. Praying that that boy didn't get the message so I could hurt him again, it had taken my pain away seeing him in agony. The knowledge that I wasn't alone in this hell comforted me even though it was by my hand that I hurt my own son, drawing blood. Like I said, Gohan never really meant anything to me before, now he just represents everything that I lost. I won't let someone take those boys away from me. One saves my soul and gives me such joy, while the other is my stress release doll to take my anger out on.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five: Piccolo's POV

The night was quite and cold considering it was the middle of the summer. Uncrossing my legs, I strolled over to the edge of the lookout, looking down towards the clouds as if they would part so that I could see the earth so far beneath the lookout and Korin's tower. I couldn't meditate here, nor at Bulma's after everything that happened today. Every time I closed my eyes, my mind takes over, playing out the scene I read in Gohan's journal, about him being pinned under me, withering in ecstasy as I took him. I had to admit that it was a tempting to give in to what he wanted just so I could see the boy lose his mind and control, submitting himself and his body to me. I growled at myself for thinking such thoughts.

Namekian's aren't known for their sex drives since they mainly reproduced A-sexually but we're capable of having sex. I have a penis and balls like every other male on this planet. Though unlike the other males on this planet, having sex never seemed to hold any real appeal to it. That was until I read Gohan's damn journal. Before today, there had only been a handful of times that I could remember in my life in my prior form where I ever had a semi-hard on about anything and yet for the first time in my life; I had a full on erection and a craving to see how accurate Gohan's dream was to his reactions during sex.

Growling at myself, again, I walked off the edge of the lookout, letting myself free fall for a moment before catching myself before letting myself take off in a random direction. I didn't really know where I was flying to, just that I was. It was freeing at times to have nothing but the wind blowing past you and seeing the endless expanse that could take you almost anywhere. To go where ever you want and not have to deal with traffic, like humans do on the land.

I felt myself beginning to landed, though I had no idea why, I was enjoy the flight. Looking around it was the place where I used to meditate while Gohan use to goof off playing with a baby dinosaur that he befriended. I landed on the shore and looked at the mirror like surface of the water that reflected back the night sky at me. I still felt cold, though the clearing felt peaceful. It felt like I had come home. Closing my eyes I took a deep breath to calm my shot nerves, when I notice the faint smell of blood in the air. It wasn't just any blood that I smelt but one that I knew almost as well as I knew my own scent.

I fallowed my nose towards the waterfall. Noticing the blood drops that where on the rocks leading into the hidden cave. Fallowed the path into the cave, nothing could have prepared be for what I would find. My eyes widen seeing Gohan laying shirtless on the ground at the back of the cave, with a pool of blood around his right shoulder. Carefully I walked over to the teen; my heart sank noticing the amount of blood that was around him. I wasn't sure he could survive with how much blood was around him. I touched his neck looking for a pulse, it was weak but steady though his skin was as cold as ice.

Carefully I lifted the boy up, being mindful of the wound on his side. I noticed a wound on his right shoulder that wasn't bandage, blood still seeping from the wound. I knew the boy heals fast but his body wouldn't heal fast enough to save his life. I carefully held him in the sitting position, in a way that let me have access to the wound. Carefully wiping the edges of the wound clean with my cape, noticing it was a very deep, long but thin, stab like wound that has gone into the bone. I licked it knowing that my saliva would numb the area for awhile and stop the bleeding, buying his body some time to heal the injury.

I carried him out of the cave and laid him on the grass to get a look at the wound that he had bandage up. After I untied the knots and pulled away the soaked pieces of cloth, there was a similar wound to the first one but it had rougher edges to it, then the first wound did. "What happened to you Gohan? You weren't hurt like this a few hours ago..." I said softly to him though he didn't answer. After I cleaned up the wound and licked it to stop bleeding, I sat back looking at him. He had grown since the Cell games now coming up to the bottom of my ribs, instead of being about waist height on me. I laid my cape over him trying to keep him warm while I left him to go get fire wood to build a fire to keep us both warm for the rest of the night. The taste of his blood still lingered in my mouth making it water at its sweet flavour. Normally the taste of blood is repulsive to me but with Gohan's blood I found that I wanted to know how it tasted when passion and lust was mixed in it, to feel it rush past my fangs.

I shook my head trying to clear my thoughts as I dropped the logs onto the ground and used a weak ki blast to start the fire. Sitting across the fire from Gohan I closed my eyes and found myself slipping into meditation easily this time.

It wasn't until I heard the start of the bird songs did I pull myself out of the meditation even though I didn't want to lose the calmness that had settled in this little clearing. Looking up, it was clear to see the sky was getting lighter as the sun inch ever closer to the horizon. I noticed the fire was getting low so I left the camp again to get more wood to keep the fire going not knowing how long it would be needed. I noticed that I no longer was cold like I was when I left the lookout last night. I thought it was because of the fire but since I wasn't by it at the moment, I knew it wasn't the answer to why I felt warm again. Getting back to the makeshift camp, I noticed Gohan was sitting up looking down at the cape that had pooled in his lap. I said nothing knowing full well that he'll talk when he was ready to when he first wakes up.

"Why?" out of all the words in the universe did he have to use that one word? Alone. I didn't know what he was asking or trying to ask, as I tossed the log into the fire. I sat behind him so that his back was to me before pulling him to lay back against me as I stared into the fire. "Why is everything that I'm involved in turn into a nightmare?" he asked. I knew he was looking up at me for an answer, for the one that I didn't have.

"You're over thinking things Gohan, nothings turned into a nightmare, the androids were stop, remember, preventing said nightmare." I said softly but I knew he wasn't over thinking things at the moment. I watched him do that to himself in his fight with cell when Goku made Gohan fight in his place. He helped in the fight with Radditz that had also taken Goku's life, that was the first step we all took in using the boy to do what we needed done but couldn't do for ourselves. Just having him on the battle field when we fought Nappa and Vegeta had lead me to my death to save the boy's life; who went all the way to Namek just to wish me back even though the odds were stacked against him. The boy had even pissed off both Vegeta and Frieza at the same time to save the life of Dende and find the dragon balls. Hell he took it upon himself to fight Frieza to try to give Goku the time he needed to heal for the fight even though it nearly killed the boy to do it. Look at where his fight with Cell got him; his father dead, a baby brother and left alone with that harpy. I'm not surprised that he would over analyze everything about his life because of what we made him do. I felt him trying to sit up again but I wouldn't let him. "Gohan, rest it will you or your going to reopen your wounds and bleed to death" I growled angrily that he didn't care about himself enough to lay still for a few hours so that he could heal.

"I can't stay here...not like this...I have to get home...have to finish cleaning up before Goten get's home..." he said struggling try and sit up again. I smirked at the shocked look written on his face when I moved him to lay back, with me straddling him, pinning him to the ground beneath me. I blinked, noticing the fear and hurt in his eyes. "please...just let me go Piccolo. You want me to forget that I love you remember. How can I do that if I keep seeing you? I don't want to be the cause for messing your life up as well as dealing with my messed up one" he whimpered out. I sighed. He was right I was the one who told him I wasn't interested in him like that. I don't know what the hell to think of our relationship anymore; if we're friends or more than that.

"Just because I'm not in love with you Gohan doesn't mean I want you to get yourself killed on me." I growled out darkly, seeing the spark defiance come to life in his eyes.

"Maybe I want to Die! Ever thought about that? That the possibility of standing at your side was the only thing that kept me going since my fight with Cell" I froze. I knew he was still hurting emotionally from that fight but I never even though that I was his reason that he used every day for four year to try and put his life back together after that fight. I felt something warm on my right leg then smelt the blood. Great he reopened the wound. Thinking about it, both wounds would have been close to impossible for him to give himself. I growled angrily.

"If that were true Gohan, there are better and faster ways of killing yourself then the wounds you have. Fess up Gohan who gave these to you?" I growled out next to his ear. He stiffened up under me and yet shivers ran though his body slowly causing his to relax under me. I had to shift slightly so that he couldn't catch on that his reaction to me whispering in his ear didn't help to keep my libido out of our talk. Though looking at it I could have used a different position the straddling him. Silenly sighing to myself I backed away from his ear so that I could look into his eyes.

Before I knew what happened, he had closed the distance between us. His lips brushed against mine, causing my eyes to fall shut and push our lips more firmly together. I all my years of live I had never been kissed and yet here I was deepening the kiss Gohan had started. My tongue ran along his bottom lip causing a mew from him and his lips to part. Exploring every inch of his hot mouth made me so painfully hard and yet I couldn't pull back from him. My left hand had shifted to hold the back of his head to me as our tongues met and started to slid against each. He moaned into the kiss that set my blood on fire and a growl of approval to come from me much like the ones he described in his journal. Slowly we both pulled back from the kiss and the intensity of it that left us both breathless. He laid back on the ground, he looked pale again but the blush on his cheeks stood out in sharp relief from the white skin.

"It doesn't matter how I got the wounds Piccolo and as much as I want more kisses like that with you, I can't have that." I hear him say weakly, breathlessly but there was such sorrow backing his words up. His honey and pine scent was heavy with both fear of something that he wasn't telling me and lust that was a clear as night in his eyes let along any other part of his body. "I have to go Piccolo unless you want me to bleed out and die here" I growled in disappointment at having to let him go so I didn't lose him because of my stubbornness. I watched him teleported away, his scent almost instantly cut in half of what it just was. Sighing, I felt my lips tingle when the air passed over them from the kiss we shared. I felt cold again, now that he wasn't under me. I think I have my answer to why I've been feeling could since I turned him down yesterday at Bulma's place.

Maybe I was wrong to deny us both this deeper relationship. Maybe I need the kid to be at my side just as much as he wants to be there. Perhaps this was always supposed to happen to us. In this body I'm only four years older than him but then I'm a reincarnation of my former self. God this is too much to think about with all these unwritten rules about love. How am I to know what is right to do besides the answer I gave him yesterday when it's clear that both of us are suffering from that option.

Looking at the spot where he just was there was two pools of blood where his wounds where. Indeed his wounds had reopened but it wasn't as much as there should have been before I licked them which was good. At least the kid was healing nicely on his own now than he was last night when I found him. I just have to find away to get him out of that house for a few day so I can talk to him without him having an excuse of having to go home, to do chores for that harpy of a mother he has. God i'm never telling Vegeta that his name for the woman has caught on, he doesn't need any more ego then he already has.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six: Bulma's POV

Coffee, how I love you. I know it's a stupid addiction to have but I wouldn't be able to get through a day without it. Even more so today since, sleep eluded me last night. I just learned that father of my child and my kind-of-sort-of boyfriend was a transfer male and could have children without having a woman in the mix. It disturbed me out hugely just thinking about Vegeta bring pregnant. I know that Vegeta doesn't like to really talk to anyone or do anything outside train but I can't let this go. How could I, both Gohan and Goten had it as well, who knows how that got effected by the cross breeding?

I heard Vegeta starting to stir upstairs. Nervously I went up to his room and walked into the nearly bare room. Three photos sat on the dresser; one of the whole z-team since Namek minus Goku, one of me and Trunks together and one picture of Goku at Roshi's island for the hangout day that got crashed by Radditz. "Hey Vegeta... can we talk?" God it feels like I'm telling him that I'm pregnant all over again. He looked at me raising and eye brow at me. His way of saying go on. Sighing, I walked over to his bed and took a seat on it so that I was facing him.

"Bare with me, it's difficult for me to ask anything about this topic. About being a transfer male... are they general bisexual or..." I couldn't finish the question. I didn't know if I could or if I wouldn't say the word.

"Out of any places to start you pick there." He said with a laugh. "Most of them were bi though many preferred male lovers over female lovers since there was so few females on the planet. Before you ask yes I'm bi" he said watching me and stool the question from my mouth. To took a sip of the coffee cup as he got up to get dressed. His highly toned body with all those lean muscles was a turn on. Probably would have turned me on even if he were fully gay. "Look Bulma. I know your worrying about it because Gohan and Goten being affected by it. They're going to be fine."

"I'm not so sure about that Vegeta. You saw Gohan yesterday, he's a mess and I'm not just talking about the amount of drugs that were in his system. What if it's affecting him differently than it should have." I pointed out and he stopped moving and looking at me. "Forget that their only half saiyan?" I asked him softly. Hidden behind his icy walls that tried to keep everyone out, there was a spark of worry about Gohan.

"He's fifteen Bulma, a teenager who lives in a house controlled by that harpy, who has never come to terms with what happened in that fight with Cell. Because of him, none of us live in a nightmare but him. How many friends does he have that's his age? I count one: Dende. He has little to no one to talk to about wants going on his live that understand from a point of view that's similar to his own." He said for once without the cold tone in his voice. He must have really cared about the three hybrids if he could talk about them and not be cold about it. He did bring up a good point though; Gohan didn't really have any one his own age to be himself around. I should bring that up to Chi-chi maybe going to a public school would be a good idea for him to met people his own age and make friends with.

"Maybe your right Vegeta... I just can't get over this whole transfer male thing. How would any of us know if you or the boys were in danger of dying? We don't know what to look for..." I felt stupid for asking it but it was an honest question. How do I know if Vegeta was well himself since that fight? He was back to being distant with everyone and doing nothing but train. His only way of bonding with Trunks was training the boy to fight. I bit my thumb nail. It was a reflex to do it when I was concentration on something of if I was really worried about something.

"I don't know the answer to that Bulma, I only lived on my home world for eight years before it was destroyed most of that time I can't remember or I was off on assignments for Frieza. I just know what transfer male's are and abit of why they were important for our race to continue. I know a bit of how transfers, I already told you about it yesterday." he said before turning back to the dresser and the pictures on it. I didn't know if he was trying not to show his regret of not knowing more about it or if we was trying not to blow a gasket. I got up and walked over to him, hugging him. His back pressed against my chest. I felt one of his hands rest for a moment on mine and the gentle squeeze before he let go. I let go of him and fallowed him out of his room. He headed off towards the kitchen before going to the training room; I headed towards Trunks' room. Opening the door to peek in, a smile tugged at my lips seeing the two boys still asleep on the bed. Goten was curled up into a ball beside Trunks who head was hanging off the edge of the bed. They right hands reached towards the other, holding onto the hand that was offered to them. It was a cute sight, though I could help but think that one day in the future they might not be sleeping on the same bed so innocently like they are now.

"Mom, is Gohan going to be okay? He looked like he was in so much pain yesterday." I heard Trunks asked. I poked my head back into the room seeing the boy was awake but didn't move from his spot, his pricing blue eyes drilling into my eyes. I didn't know what to tell the four year that would comfort him, letting him know that everything would be alright.

"He'll be fine Trunks. Gohan's just going through a rough time rate now. He's a strong boy, he'll get through it." I said finding myself wanting to believe the words myself. I had a bad feeling in my gut that things were going to get worse for the boy before things got better for him. "Know how you always protect Goten and how he always protects you?" he nodded. "Gohan and Piccolo have a similar friendship, if Gohan gets in trouble Piccolo will be there to protect him and vice-versa." I said thinking back to all the times Gohan had put himself in danger on Namek just so he could wish Piccolo back after Piccolo got himself killed to save Gohan from Nappa's attack. From what everyone told me about the fight with Cell; that Gohan killed the Cell Junor's that attack the team, starting with the one that Piccolo was fighting before killing the others. Who would have thought that all it took was Goku's son to turn the demon king into one of Earth's greatest defenders.

"Doesn't explain why brother's heart was broken. It was clear in his eyes even if he was trying to hide it." I heard Goten said. Both had been awake, just lying there this whole time. Maybe they couldn't sleep much like I couldn't. Maybe they knew something that I didn't. I sighed and opened the door to the dark room, shaking my head

"I don't know the answer to that one Goten, you'll have to ask Gohan when you see him today. Come on boys, it's time for breakfast" I said leaving the door open for them and headed back down stairs. I wasn't much of a cook but my mother loved to do that and she made lots of food since Goten eat like his father and Trunks and Vegeta both eat huge amounts in their own right. I only got half way down the stairs when the two boys ran pass me to go eat breakfast. Laughing I shook my head. Getting into the kitchen I noticed Vegeta ruffling Trunks' hair as the boy sat beside his father and started to eat. He must have beat Goten to the table. I had just filled my cup up again when the door bell rang.

"You guys sit and Eat, I'll get it." I said leaving my cup next to the coffee maker and headed for the door running my hand through my hair wishing already for the day to be over. Opening the door, there stood Chi-chi looking anxious. "Come on in Chichi. What's wrong sweetie?" I asked her as I let her in. She didn't look like she slept the night before. I lead her to the living room to talk. She looked like she could use it.

"Did Gohan say anything to you yesterday? Besides trying to blame me for tiring to kill him with poison when he did it to himself?" She asked me nearly, breaking down into tears. Thinking back the only thing that Gohan really said besides Chi-chi possibly poisoning the food was when he asked if Goten could stay with us and that he might spend time alone in the woods to work some things out.

"Nothing really, just that he wanted Goten to stay here if you had poisoned him while he spent time alone out in the woods." I said telling the heart broken woman what Gohan had told me, causing her break down into tears. "Chichi what happened, you can tell me, I'm here to help, remember?" I said sitting beside her, pulling her to me as I hugged her to me, rubbing her back. Looking her over, I noticed the dried blood around her finger nails and a cut on the palm of her right hand that wasn't there yesterday.

"Gohan tried to kill himself last night. I found him in his room with a knife. I watched him stab himself in the side. I fought him to get the knife out of his hands. Once I had the knife I asked him why he would do something like this. All he could say is that he didn't want to live in this world anymore if he wasn't loved. I tiered to tell him how much I love him but he wouldn't listen to any of it. He also wouldn't let me dress his wound till after he passed out last night. Where did I go wrong with him Bulma?" She cried on my shoulder. I couldn't believe my ears. I knew Gohan had broken down yesterday after he and Piccolo had a talk but I just thought it was about Goku being dead. Maybe I was wrong maybe Gohan loved Piccolo and Piccolo had rejected the teen and he took it badly.

"Chichi sweetie, just give him some time to cool off. Maybe you should send him to public school, let him meet kids his own age. Maybe that all he really needs to climb out of this depression he's in." I suggested to her. I manage to grab the box of tissues for her as she tried to stop crying on me. I still couldn't believe what she told me about Gohan. I never would have pegging the boy to try something so stupid but then having Piccolo's respect and approval was weighted so heavily in the boys mind, that had Piccolo reacted badly to Gohan's 'coming out' it might have caused the boy to lose what little sanity he had left from his fight with Cell.

Once I manage to get Chichi to calm down to where she could drive home again safely did I let her go and got up to get Goten ready to head home. "Goten, Trunks it's time to clean up now, It's time for Goten to head home now." I called up the stairs where the boys had gone up after they finished eating as Vegeta most likely went to train. A few moments later, Goten and Trunks came down the stairs, laughing about some joke they shared.

"Thank you Bulma, I think I'll take you up on that idea about sending Gohan to school. How about I bring Goten over for a sleep over next weekend and we can go over the school possibilities." Chichi said getting her shoes on while Goten and Trunks said their goodbyes.

"Sounds good Chichi I'll be here all week, call if plans change" I said watching the pair leave. I didn't know why but my heart sank watching them climb into the car and drive off. God I hope that sending Gohan to school would help him get through this, somehow I doubt it but then who knows, it might help Gohan better than any of us could hope for. Closing the door, I turned my attention away from the problem of Gohan and to the one of designing the time-ship that Trunks had used when he came back in time two warn us about the androids. Never know when you're going to need one, though this invention isn't going to be getting out to the public's hands.


	7. Chapter 7

**Authors Note:** I want to say thanks to everyone who had read my story so far and who had favoured it. I never thought my first Fanfic would get such great fans. I want to give a special thanks to Terga Dare, and CrazyXAngel for your reviews and encouragement/ideas to keep the story going. I also have to give huge thanks to Master Rikanna who got me to post the story online so she could read it and so that all of you could read it as well.

Chapter Seven: Gohan's POV

I heard the car pulling up as I set the table while dinner was cooking; spaghetti and garlic bread. I was trying to make myself useful while 'mother' was gone. It had taken me two hours of masturbating before I found release so I could get my body back under my control, all do to one kiss from Piccolo this morning. I was also glad that I got Dad to teach me the instant transition during the three years we had to train before we had to deal with 16, 17, 18, 19 and Dr. Gero. Trying to fly with an erection and dealing with blood loss would have been a bad thing. Dad taught it to piccolo also figuring it was easier teach them both at once, then to do it at two different times, that why we could start teaching it to the others but after dad died to only ones that I really saw where Vegeta, Trunks and Piccolo and the prince's didn't want to learn the tecnquie and Goten was to young to start learning it. He didn't even know how to fly let lone fight so teaching him the technique would have been pointless at the moment.

"Welcome home, I'm glad that your trip was safe." I said bowing to mom and Goten as they came in. "Dinner's almost done." I said as they took off their shoes and coats. I was glad that for one night I didn't have to worry about eating poison that was going to strong in the meal till I earned back her trust that I doubt I ever get close to having after what happened last night. Just the thought of it made my side and shoulder ache but at least they were almost healed thanks to whatever Piccolo did to me when he found me last night. After putting the finishing touches on the meal I put it on the table letting them dish up fist while I grabbed myself a drink before taking my seat.

I felt like an outsider listening in as they talked about everything Goten and Trunks did last night, to Goten asking to be trained to fight. I managed to hide my shocked expression when mom not only agreed to it, but offered to train the boy who took her help giddily. When I had asked, I had gotten yelled at to go study, leaving me with one option to in order to train; sneaking out. I knew for sure at that moment that Goten was clearly her favourite child. Though I couldn't tell if she like him enough not to hurt the boy like she threatened to.

"Hey Gohan...what happened yesterday you looked like you were in pain." Goten had suddenly turned his attention to me making me freeze mid bite. "What did you and Piccolo talk about that made you both upset? Don't say you weren't talking to him, both Trunks and I saw your two sitting on the back deck yesterday." I didn't know what to say to the boy and at the moment I was glad the my mouth was full, so I took my time chewing it trying to think something to tell the boy that would satisfy his curiosity while making mom happy that I wasn't 'corrupting' her favourite boy.

"I graduated from his teaching. I won't be training with Piccolo anymore and that we might not see or hang out together anymore unless something threatens the earth again like Cell." I knew Goten knew about Cell. I had told him the PG version if that fight so he knew why dad wasn't here with us. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice mom's smirk that she thought she had hidden behind her hands.

"That would suck; it would be like being friends with Trunks one day and his enemy the next. It would feel like the world was coming to an end." I nodded at the boy's simple logic at times like this. Though I felt horrible for lying to him about what really happen between me and Piccolo. Maybe I was suffering the similar effect to though three other saiyans who chose death to join their loves, just I was choosing death instead of living in a world where I couldn't be with the man I love. I should have asked Vegeta about what to expect if I went down that road but I figured I'd find out on my own if it was meant to happen.

I simply kept eating the last of the food while Goten and Chichi moved to watch a movie together. From the opening song I'm guessing they were watching Mama Mia but then I could be wrong, I wasn't big on watching movies, I rather watch nature then anything Hollywood could ever produce. After eating and cleaning up the dishes I walked upstairs to my room with a heavy sigh.

'_**Gohan, can you hear me?'**_ I smiled hearing Piccolo's voice in my head and yet it hurt to hear it at the same time. I felt like my heart was finally beating again and yet I knew it was always beating.

'_**I can hear you Piccolo, w-whats up?'**_ I ask feeling myself blushing and my lips starting to tingle again from just hearing his voice. It was clear that my body hadn't forgotten how it felt to be trapped under Piccolo or being kissed by the man. If anything I was craving more of that delirious contact.

'_**I wanted to let you know that I'm going to planet Namek for awhile, there are some things that I need to talk to my own kind about it and Dende doesn't know the answers that I seek.'**_ I almost couldn't breathe or believe what I was heard. Panic rose up in me as I laid on my bed trying to keep myself from teleporting to him and begging him not to leave. I knew he had a good reason to go, even if he didn't tell me why.

'**I**_**s it because of the kiss we had today that your leaving Piccolo? I swear it won't happen again, just don't leave me here alone'**_ I heard myself cry out from the panic in my mind. I knew it wouldn't change his mind and I felt his mind go into conflict again, like it had before and after the kiss. Like he really didn't want to leave me behind and yet he knew he had to go. _**'I'm sorry it was selfish of me to ask you to stay, go if you have to go, I'll be fine' **_I didn't want to bring him conflict like this. I knew it was a bad idea to kiss him but I needed to know what it was like to feel his lips on mine, to run my tongue over his fangs. I groaned to myself scolding myself for thinking about it, even though I promised not to think about it anymore.

I heard a growl come though the link, it was strained, as if he was thinking the same thing as me. _**'Gohan...I'm sorry...god I don't know what to do Gohan can't you see that. It took me 11 years for me to call you a friend Gohan...'**_ I didn't know what to say and yet I felt a tear slip from my eyes. For all my life I've never really known Piccolo never to make his mind up about something and yet I was torturing the man by keeping him here. Hopefully he can get the answers he needed on Namek.

'_**You should get going Piccolo, it's going to be a long trip there and back...if you come back... don't worry about me really I can take care of myself'**_

'_**Funny like you took care of those wounds last night Gohan'**_ he growled darkly. I gasped and arched on my bed. I couldn't help it. It didn't matter the cause of the growl, it still made me want to submit to him, pull him on top of me and bare my neck to him, putting my life in his hands. When the sound stopped I cursed myself for giving to my instincts again.

'_**I would have been fi-'**_

'_**That's a lie and we both know it. You would have bleeding out in that cave if I didn't come by when I did'**_

'_**What does it matter? Either I'm going to get killed by the harpy's hands or die by what I am. Why else would you go to Namek? You don't want to be here when it happens cause you can handle watching everyone else die but you can't handle watching me die. What happened to the great and mighty Demon King?'I**_ knew betted then to taunt Piccolo or push his anger and yet I couldn't help it. He made me sound weak that I couldn't protect myself. The sad thing was, he was right, I couldn't protect myself, not against the harpy anyways. He growled again in anger, I couldn't stop the whimper that rang though my mind and past my lips that had parted in a silent gasp.

'_**Because I'm not letting my best friend die without a fight, mark my words kid if you get yourself killed before I get back, I'll go to hell myself to drag you back here just to kill you for it.'**_ he said so coldly that I only remember hearing it on the first day he met when he had dropped me into the lack when I was unconscious. I shivered at the sounds of it yet I wanted to hear it again. Great now I'm playing with fire and enjoying again like I had when I was beating on Cell. I sighed.

I sat up hearing my bedroom door open seeing mom walk in and shut the door. I couldn't help the fear that rang though me. "What are you doing up here Fagot?" I heard her hiss out as I broke out into cold sweat. I didn't know what it say to get her to leave me alone and the growling in my head from Piccolo wasn't helping. I forgot that I was still linked to Piccolo's mind and the he could hear what I was hearing.

"I was just thinking about going to a public school, you know to met good, smart girls and not give in to my...'sickness'" I managed to say without stuttering. She still punched me in the gut.

"Good boy. When I come up here again you had better be studying and really studying this time" she hissed out. I nodded holding my gut. I couldn't turn the link off and feeling ashamed by having him know just how weak I was by giving into what she wanted. I heard the leave my room again, which let me breath out a sigh of relief even though I was still in pain.

'_**Gohan leave that house.'**_ I heard Piccolo growl out as I curled up on myself from the pain. I silently cried into my pillow. If I left now, I would be abandoning my brother to the furry of that woman. I couldn't do it; I couldn't leave till I got the boy away from the woman.

'_**You have somewhere you need to be Piccolo and so do I. Until I can get Goten away from the wharpy, I'm not leaving him alone with her.'**_ I growled back at him. The long he drew out his departure the more it hurt and the more I wanted to cling to the man and beg him not to leave me behind. I knew I was being stubborn about it. He growled back though the link.

'_**You better leave if things get to dangerous Gohan even if you have to take Goten with you, I want you both alive when I get back'**_ he said before the link cut out. I hated how Piccolo had better control over the mental link between us then I did and it was my gift that allowed for the ability to talk to the man telepathically. I didn't know if he had already left the planet yet or not. It didn't matter the second that he closed the link; I lost all hope of him ever coming back. It hurt worse than any pain I had ever felt before. Weakly I dragged myself off the bed and over to the desk to study, trying to block the pain I was in. Maybe this was the sign that I thought my heart would warn me against; about fallowing down the same path to death the three others had taken before me.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight: Piccolo's POV ~Two year later~

I sat on the edge of a cliff overlooking the ocean and the two moons that chased each other. One was red, the other was blue. I spent the better part of the year watching their chase across the night sky. I didn't train for close a year that I was here. Most of the time I went about helping the villages with their daily tasks while trying to figure out whether or not I should cross the line with Gohan and take our relationship further but even after two years I still didn't know the answer about it.

"I noticed that your still here after a year, something must really be eating at you." I heard a voice ring out from behind me. I hadn't heard anyone coming which shocked me. The only one who was able to do that was Gohan but then my body knew when the boy was approaching. "Where's your mate Piccolo?" I looked over my shoulder at Elder Moori. The man was doing well and everyone loved him the grand elder had made the right decision when he put the man in charge.

"I'm not mated." I growled out defensively which probably didn't help my cause. I knew what he was asking. Mate wasn't being used in the context that most humans use as a way to call each other friends but in the context of being joined to another for the rest of time and eternity, unable to live without the other nearby.

"Not fully perhaps, I noticed you shivering from time to time and yet it's never cold out when you shiver. I think your closer to someone then you think you are or care to admit to. I talked to Kami when we were on earth about you. I was lost to how one of our finest warriors in our history couldn't care about another. He told me how when your two where joined the first time, all the darkness that he observed, he was losing himself to it, so he cleansed himself, creating it created you. Growing up nothing but hate I can understand why something like loving another could be hard for you to come to terms with." He said as he took a seat beside me. Great, Kami talked about me to the leader of the race. Gee don't I feel special.

"Doesn't matter what either of us want, we can't cross that line." I said looking up at the moons again.

"Ah, so it's Gohan that you share such a deep bond with, not surprising really." My eyes widen and I looked over at the man out of the corner of my eye. Am I really that obvious about it? Wait, what the hell did he mean it's wasn't surprising that it was Gohan who effected me so much.

"Moori?"

"When that child first came to Namek he did it mainly for you and you alone. He confided a lot in Dende when we were on earth. Most of our kind doesn't mate now because most of us had come about through eggs from the same man before the great storms the ravaged the old planet but before the storms mating occurred all the time. On this whole planet there is one possible pair that are going through what you're going though. The difference is that they're not fighting the attraction they share for each other."

"He's my student; I've watched him go from a child to a teen while I haven't changed. I have hundreds of years of memories that I lived through in another form while that boy had only been alive for 16 years." I growled out, knowing the words where true but the look in the man's wise eyes told me that he didn't believe that would stop me from taking what I wanted and normally it wouldn't but this was Gohan. That kid held on to so much untapped power that he nearly lost himself in it. It made me proud that I had a huge hand in shaping him to handle that power but in a way I felt responsible for putting the boy through the hell he faced in the aftermath of Cell.

"What's the real reason that's keeping you two apart Piccolo?" I froze. I don't know how to answer him. Every day that passed that I was away from the boy or out of the range of using the mental communication range made me feel like I was bleeding out all over again after taking a ki blast from Nappa.

"I don't know. If I knew that answer would I be here talking to you?" I snapped back I knew he was trying to help but I didn't know why I keep rejecting him and yet allowing him to come back to me. Maybe it was my way of punishing us for developing a bond this deep.

"I suppose that's true. Tell me something Piccolo, could it be that you want to give into what it sounds like you both are craving but can't because you don't know how to take the final step and join with the boy completely?" I didn't know how to answer that one. I thought about it but it didn't tend to help with how cold I felt or the pain that was starting to build intensity in my body and heart. How would one make such a thing possible since I'm assuming Namekain mating ritual was going to be very different from the saiyan one meaning that I might be joined to him but he might not be joined to me.

"I grew up on Earth how would I know anything about it? The only reason I know what sex even is because of how long I've lived and watched what humans did." I said as I laid back trying to make the pain was flared up go away. I almost wish that I had kept going from that kiss two years ago, to see what it was like to have a taste of what it would have been like to be with the boy to have him submit to me to give up complete control to me, trusting me to give him what he wanted, needed.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but are you the dominate one in the relationship?" I nodded thinking back to the kiss. Gohan may have started it when he brought his lips against mine but he responded to ever move that I made as if he craved to be dominated. "There's two parts to the mating ritual; the part on the dominate one's side and the part on the submissive one's side. I don't know if saiyan's have a mating ritual to use for his side but for you; bring him to where it feels like home to you. Bring a knife with you so that you can cut him to like the blood from the wound. It doesn't have to deep but enough to draw blood. From their your next step in making in complete the mating bound is to bite into his flesh drawing blood just as you climax, your fangs will release a poison that will connect you to him or kill him." He said like it was no big deal. Thinking about it that night two years ago, I had found Gohan, in the clearing and I had teased him blood. Fuck I almost mated with the boy and didn't know it

"What happens if the ritual was started but never finished?" I asked I knew that messing around with something like that was a bad idea. He looked at me with a questioning look. "I did the first two things already; two years ago I left to come here the day after it happened." I answered his unspoken question. "I just fallowed instincts, he was bleeding out I did it to save his life." I said defending the reason why I did it.

"Either finish the mating or never see the boy again. It's the only way to keep you both alive. If you go back to earth and see him without finish what's been start it, it's going to kill you both. My advice Piccolo; whatever it is that's making you so hesitant to be with him, forget about it and claim him already. I think you've both waited long enough to be happy." I watched him get up and head back towards the Village.

If I go back to earth to ask Vegeta about saiyan mating, Gohan would know I'm back. If he was anything like how he was when I left, he would beg to see me. He begged me not to go and I knew that even when he said he knew I had to go and that I should go I still felt how desperate he was for me not to leave him behind. I was also wishing that by now that he had gotten out of the house before that harpy really hurt him. I'm not even going to bother lying to myself, I thought about stay with him on earth when he begged me to stay with him, just so I could kill that woman for hurting him.

Moori was right; I couldn't go back to Earth and not be see him. It was go back to Earth and claim the kid after talking to Vegeta or I could stay here and go back on my word to go back to earth and see him, either way I would go back on my word to him. Sighing I got up, flying over to my ship that sat on a nearby island. I picked up the phone that was in there. I never thought I would be glad that Bulma would invent a way to talk to others from across the universe.

Picking up the phone, I dialled up her number. "What do you want!" I smirked hearing Vegeta's angry voice. I was glad he answered. Bulma would never drop it about her invention was a good one.

"Information from you" I growled back at him with a smirking knowing that it he must of had a shock looked on his face that I called. "How does the saiyan mating ritual work?" I asked while he was still getting over the fact that I called.

"From which side?" God how I love talking to Vegeta; fast and to the point, with no fluff.

"Submissive's or Transfer's side"

"You doing this for Gohan aren't you?"

"Got a problem with it?"

"Not if you don't get your ass back here soon"

"I will if you tell me what I need to know."

"A knife is needed. Preferably a double edge one. Entwine right hand to right hand with the knife pressed against both wrists. Using the left hand both, press your right wrists onto the knife as the left hands pull the knife out from between the two wrists. The two wounds should line up as the as the knife moves. Tie the wrists together so that the wounds are held tightly together keep them tied together for the rest of the night no matter how awkward things get from that point on. It's important to be face to face with him for the first time. If it's done right and provided that his hybrid blood didn't mess around with the mating response, he'll grow fangs as he nears climax. He'll end up biting you drawing blood from you as his fang releasing a poison into your blood. If it's successful you both will wake up. If it fails one or both of you will be dead by morning."

"I'll be back on earth in a year's time, make sure the kid doesn't get himself killed while I'm on my way back to earth." I hung up the phone before he could say a thing. I sighed. I know I could teleport anywhere on Earth but I didn't know if I could teleport from Namek to Earth leaving me to take the same way I got to Namek, a year's traveling through space. At least it would give me time to plan out how to make that cross mating work while making sure there was little that could go wrong one I get Gohan to meet me back at the clearing without raising the harpy's suspicion about anything. Chuckling to myself I set in a course back to Earth, setting the speed to the fastest it would go. I wanted to see the boy now that I knew what I was going to do about what was going on between myself and the kid.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine: Gohan's POV ~A year later~

It's almost been three years to the day since I kissed Piccolo. I still craved him to the point where I felt sick every day. The abuse from Chichi never stopped. It became a pattern. Every three days she would beat me. Most of the times she used a knife to stab me. Today would make it three days since my last beating from her. I knew it was going to bed a really bad one since Goten was going to be spending the weekend at Bulma's house.

Since I started school three years ago; I've dated about 50 girls and changed schools six times. It's already been a week since I've last changed schools and I'm already on my second girlfriend...Videl Satan. She's the daughter of the man who showed up to fight Cell but was taken out by a punch from the man, yet he got the credit for killing Cell and being the hero of the world when that title should have gone to dad. He was the one who died to save the earth when Cell nearly exploded. The only reason why I've started to date at this new school is because I've gotten blackmailed into it, twice.

Hell I even got blackmailed into fighting in that stupid 'Fun Under the Sun' world tournament. Oh Vegeta laughed so hard when he found out about that one and now the whole team's whole team showing up to it. Even Dad is coming back to fight in it. At least I have that going for me when I told mom last night. She looked so thrilled. Maybe it'll save me from the beating that was coming when she got back from dropping Goten off at Bulma's. Standing up from my desk I sighed, taking off my school shirts and looked at myself in the mirror.

Very faint white scars married my pale skin, showing where she stabbed me every time minus the first two times she stabbed me. There were no scars from it. Whatever Piccolo did to patch me up when he found me really worked. Going from memory of my mentor, I'm guessing that I would now stand about shoulder level with him. I purred as I felt his mind come in range with my telepathic ability. I couldn't stop myself from doing it or for reaching out to his mind. I gave up hope of him ever coming back and resided to living in hell; day in and day out, with constant pain. For the first time since the day he left I felt hope again.

'_**Welcome back Piccolo'**_ I said trying to sound like I had gotten over him like he asked me to do. I hadn't. I tried to, I really did but every time I kissed anyone. I felt like I was being burned from the inside out while freezing from outside in. My head would start to pound. I never stuck around long enough to find out what happened after the first kiss.

'_**I need to talk to you kid, Can you met me at the clearing tonight?' **_he sounded so much calmer then the last time I talked to him. I wanted to say yes and met him there but I didn't say anything as a response to him as I put on my once favourite shirt that Chichi had stabbed through several times and blood that stained it. _**'Gohan please tell me your still not in the house with that woman' **_I heard him growl darkly I hung my head.

'_**I'll see if I can pull it Piccolo...'**_ I whimpered out knowing that it was pathetic but it was all I could muster before I closed the link just as I heard the car pull up. I quickly changed out of my school pants and into a pair of faded jeans. I folded the cloths as she came into the house. By the times she got up to my room the school cloths where in a plastic bag so blood wouldn't get on them, sitting on the desk.

"Glad you didn't waste time while I was gone, fagot" she hissed out grabbing the collar of my shirt and dragged me off the bed and to the floor. I dropped onto my knees before her. She ran the flat of the blade against my skin cheek. I felt a shiver of pure fear run though out my body. We both jumped as my cell phone went of playing 'Somebody Told Me' by The Killers. It was from Videl. She was the only one with that ringtone on my phone. I got a glare from Chichi as she grabbed my phone off the desk.

"Get yourself ready, you have a date to go on. Our game can wait till later." She said passing me my phone before leaving the room with the knife. I smiled to myself once she shut the door as I read over the text. I never thought I would be happy to ready 'movie night' from a girl but at the moment it was the best thing in the world. I changed my shirt into a long sleeve black shirt that I thought I looked horrible in but all the girls seemed to love me in. I ran some gel into my hair making it seem like it was styled up like it was even though it was naturally spiky. I sent her back a text; saying that I couldn't make it that I had to watch Goten and study for the text but that I owed her one and I meant it. She saved me from having to go through a night of knife play. I made sure that that I washed my face and brushed my teeth making sure that I looked like I was going to be taking her out as I grabbed the car keys.

"I'll text you if I'm going to be late getting home or spending the night in the city." I called out and closed the door behind me before she could say a word. I got in the car and drove off. It wasn't until I had driven to Bulma's house did I leave the car with her before teleporting to the clearing that I hadn't visited once since the day of the kiss. I could almost see it playing out before my eyes as I stood next to the spot. I shivered as I felt a ki signature that I hadn't felt in a long time descend.

I managed to swallow the nervousness down as I looked up at Piccolo who just landed. He was still breath taking. He always held an air about him that made him seem regal and confident but seeing him now that was over shadowed by determination and something that screamed domination. The look in his eyes told me he wasn't impressed with me and I bowed my head.

"So what did you want to talk about?" I asked looking at the ground. I knew my voice had deepened out since he left and I was taller then he remembered. I nearly jumped feeling one of his fingers hook under my chin lifting my head. His growl caused me to gasp and look up at him. I knew from the look in his eyes that he did it knowing what it did to me and wanted that effect from me.

"We're fixing what's going on between us." I didn't know what he was talking about nor did I get a chance to ask what he was talking about. His lips pressed against mine as he pulled me to him. Once press flush against him, I couldn't stop my hands from resting on his chest. I knew that I had more of a more lean build to my body giving me a more 'feminine' look then most of the guys at school. I felt his tongue brush my lips which parted for him before I could even thing about it. I heard myself moan and feel the growl that was in his chest that I couldn't hear.

He broke the kiss and stepped back from me leaving me feeling cold. "In the cave, shirt off" he growled with a commanding tone. I didn't move, I didn't know what to say. He grabbed me by the arm and pulled me towards the cave, making me go in first. He growled at me when I crossed my arms over my chest and stare at him. I then noticed the candles burning and under the ledge where I shoved my journal which was still there, there was a massive king size bed that was made and it looked so inviting. "I'm not going to say it again Gohan, shirt off, or I'll rip it off." I knew he was watching me take in what he did in the small cave. As I turn to face him again I notice a glint of something metal on the bed and looked back over to it. I ignored Piccolo for the moment and went over to the bed and sat down on it, sinking in to the memory foam. I picked you the dagger that was laying in the center of the a strip of cloth. I looked over at Piccolo trying to suppress the fear that was gnawing at me.

"It's for the mating ritual. If we're going to be together I want it done permanently. It's why I was gone for three years. I had to find out for myself if I could handle living without you. When I learned I couldn't do it I had to get some information on how to do a mating ritual that would woke for both of us." He sat on the bed beside me. He was never so open before but I guess I couldn't hide my fear as well as I thought I did with him. I didn't know what to say about what he did for us to be together. I never thought I would ever have a night like this outside my dreams. Swallowing back my fear, I put the dagger into his hands and removed my shirt. I could look up at him and he laid me on my back looking over the scars. "I told you to leave that house."

"I told you I wasn't leaving there unless I could get Goten away from her permanently" I growled back at him. With a sigh he backed off removing his shirt. I couldn't stop myself from admiring him like the girls at school admired me. I felt the blush creep up on me as I watched him remove his pants, leaving them in a pool on the ground.

"Pants off, there only going to get in the way for tonight" He commanded as he watched me. With shaking hands I removed my pants and boxers in one go. Unlike Picccolo who wasn't even semi-erect yet, I was. I moved to the center of the bed with my back facing the pillows before he even told me to move. He sat across from me.

"Before we go through with this, you need to know that if this doesn't work, it could kill us both. If you can't handle that fact, now is your chance to say it." He said. It must have been eating him inside as he planned this night out in his head, about all the what if's that could happen if it didn't work.

"I'm ready Piccolo. I rather make this attempt and fail then not to die from it and go back to how I was coping before" I said. The coping was kissing girls till I could find one that didn't make me feel like vomiting after just a kiss. I watched his nod and took my right hand in his. He pulled me closer to him so that our forearms almost fully parallel to each other. He moved them so that the back of his hand faced me while mine did the same to him with the blade of the dagger biting into our wrists. He took my left hand in his and guided it to dagger's handle. I held the handle as his hand covered mine. I couldn't help the nervousness and the fear from taking hold of my body.

His right hand held my tightly as we pulled the dagger out from between our wrists. I gasped from both pleasure and pain. I felt the blood begin to run down my arm as he pressed both our wrists. Together we tied it so our arms couldn't pull apart. I felt an ache rush though out my body, leaving behind a burning need in its wake. A whimper like moan left me. I couldn't stop it, even if I wanted too. All I knew is that I needed him more than the air at the moment. I gasped as he gently pushed me back onto the bed. I'm glad he thought things through for this night since it would be hella-hard to get undress with our wrists bounded the way they were.

"Please" I whispered out feeling his arousal brush against my leg. It caused him to chuckle before his lips pressed his lips against mine again. His tongue brushed against my bottom lip before he took it in his mouth. His fangs nicked the flesh drawing blood that we both tasted which caused me to gasp and arc into him, needing to feel him against me. I broke the kiss nearly screaming out a moan as he used our bound right hands to reach between us, taking my erection between our hands, interlocking our figures around it as he started to move our joined hands up and down the shaft.

I couldn't move. All I could do was lay back moaning giving him time to explore my body. The feel of him using both our hands to jack me off and his exploring kisses took my thoughts away from me. I hear myself moan and mewl, my left hand was gripping the blankets so tightly that I could have sworn that I was tearing the fabric. I felt like I was on the edge of my very sanity with the need to finish.

"Please what Gohan?" I heard him growl out next to my ear making me. Out of all the times for him to show his more sadistic side why did it have to be now? He was going to drive me insane and enjoy every moment of it.

"Please...let me finish...take me...I...pleasure...too much..."so much for me being intelligent after moaning that out. He nuzzled my head to the right as his lips found the spot they were seeking. If I thought sport was pleasurable in my dreams, having him nip at the flesh felt like an overload on my system which caused me to go over the edge, covering both out stomachs and hands with my seed. I nearly couldn't see straight when I opened my eyes after the release.

I watched as he coated three fingers on his left hand in the cooling pools of ejaculate that was on me, before I felt his fingers at my entrance. I whimpered at the feel of one of his fingers pushing past the tight ring of muscles and into me. Unlike my dreams it was a little more than uncomfortable but nowhere near being painful yet.

"It'll feel better if you relax" he whispered against my ear before kissing me again. I arc into him again as a second figure joined the first. I whimpered and mewled into the kiss. I couldn't stop the noise and yet I didn't want to stop no matter how painful it got. I rather be with him, in pain, then not be in pain and miss all this. When he added the third finger, I whimpered again as a tear made its way from my eye down my cheek. He nuzzled my head to the right again and licked gently at the spot where my neck met my shoulder I could tell that he wanted to use his other hand to distract me but since it was tied to my hand it made it virtually useless rate now. It wasn't long before the pain and discomfort to give way to pleasure as his hand mimic intercourse. He chuckled again when I whimpered when he removed his hand.

I knew what was coming next. I felt the tip of him brush against my entrance before pushing his way past the muscle ring. I bit my bottom like to keep from screaming from the pain. It was like nothing that I experienced before in my life and yet I couldn't get enough of it. Once he was fully in me he didn't wait for me to get over the pain but he kept the tempo slow letting things build slowly but never stopped the rythem. After a few thrusts, he brushed against something deep within me that caused me to arc my back off the bed and push myself further against him trying to get more of that white hot pleasure.

I couldn't stop moaning and screaming as he picked up speed and intensity, the whole time hitting that magic spot in me. I shook my head trying to hold back my rapidly approaching orgasm even as my canine teeth began to ache. It wasn't till his lips found that spot on my neck again did I felt the deep growl that ran though out his body. It was almost like a purr that was coming from him. I couldn't handle the pleasure that was shorting out my body and before I knew what had happened, I had bit into the left side of Piccolo's neck, muffling my scream as I came again. I orgasm again while my teeth were still in his neck, when he bit into my neck as me came within me. Slowly the pleasure left my body as he pulled away from me leaving me shivering.

I felt so tired and cold without his body above mine. It took some time to get under the blankets and curl up against him. I couldn't help it, I didn't want to be alone even though our wrists where still tied together I felt him shift me so that I was laying on top of him with our bounded hands between us. My head resting against his shoulder as his left arm rested against me, his hand on the small of my back. I wanted to say something to him but I didn't know what to say. Before I could even count to ten Piccolo was asleep. I couldn't fight myself to stay awake anymore. With a content sigh I let sleep claim me.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten: Goten's POV

I sighed and rolled over on Trunk's bed and looked at his blue LED clock. Great it was 3 am and I still hadn't fallen asleep. Trunks had fallen asleep hours ago. We knew that everyone was trying to keep what I was from us and want a mating ritual was and could happen if it was attempted. I think they forgot how good Trunks and I could hear at times. Half the time when we talk we have the radio going or we whisper back and forth while laying on his bed, like we did before he fell asleep on me.

"'Ten what's wrong? Why aren't you asleep?" I nearly jumped when Trunks whispered into my ear as he draped an arm over my hips.

"I was going over everything and how Gohan was acting today. He didn't say hi to us when he brought the car here before taking off again then to have his Ki signature to just drop off like that...I'm worried about him." I whispered back. I turned my head back so I could look at Trunks in the darkened room. I couldn't really see colors but I could see him.

"He's with Piccolo 'Ten. You heard what mom and dad said, the safest place for Gohan was with Piccolo. They wouldn't hurt each other." He yawned out. I bit my bottom lip. I knew Gohan feared mom, I also knew that he would get beaten by her. I also knew they both tried to keep it from me along with Gohan being gay. One of the boys in my class had an older sister who went to Gohan's last school and they dated for a few weeks. He told me that Gohan had broken up with her telling her he couldn't love her because he was gay. It has gotted out around the school, than he transferred schools again to this new one where he met Videl. I didn't tell mom or Gohan that I knew since it was clear that they didn't want me to know about it.

"I know Tru' but still...what if there both hurt really bad...I can't sense either of them and haven't for hours. What if they need our help and we're not there to help the-"I was cut off when a pair of warm soft lips pressed against mine. It wasn't the first time that Trunks had kissed me to shut me up when I started ranting. It wasn't with tongue or anything like what Gohan does with his girlfriends; at least before he found out he was gay. Even though it was simple kiss it still felt really good. I couldn't help but pout when he pulled again from me again.

"Relax 'Ten, when the sun comes up we'll talk dad into coming with us to check on Gohan and Piccolo if we still can't feel them by then" there was worry laced in his sleep ridden voice. I nodded only to get pulled against him so that my head could rest on his shoulder. I tensed only to feel his hand rubbing my back. "I promised you that I wouldn't let anything happen to you 'Ten, remember?" I felt myself relaxing against him and starting to fall asleep.

My eyes snapped open I was alone on the bed, rolling over I looked at the clock that now read 8:30. I pulled myself from the warm bed and over to my bag to grab a fresh set of cloths to wear once changed I headed down stairs. I blinked and caught the apple that was through at me. "We're heading out to check on Gohan and Piccolo. You slept through breakfast." I nodded as I fallowed Vegeta and Trunks outside and took off heading towards the vast forest near home.

It wasn't until that we came up on a small clearing that had a waterfall in it did Vegeta began to make a decent. "Whatever you two boys do, don't go wandering off on your own and don't go where I can't see you two." I hear Vegeta say as we landed. The whole clearing smelt of Gohan and Piccolo but it wasn't a layered scent but a blended scent that smelt like there was something else mixed into it but I didn't know what it was.

"Dad their not here, we would have seen them as we landed...we might have just missed them" I heard Trunks said. I didn't listen to them talk as I walked towards the waterfall. I noticed a path that was almost hidden by the sharp, wet rocks. I took the path into a cave.

There were several pools of wax all over the cave floor towards the back of the cave was a large bed with two figures sleeping on it. I jumped hearing a phone go off. I ignored it and slowly moved closer to the bed to see who was laying on it. I managed to hold a gaps back seeing Gohan laying on top of Piccolo with their right wrists bounded together pinned between them. I had to admit it didn't look comfy the way they were laying. I figured they weren't wearing clothes from the fact their chest and backs were exposed.

"Goten what did I say about going where I couldn't see you?" I heard Vegeta hiss walking into the cave. I looked at him for a moment than back to the bed. I moved forward so that I could untie them only to get pulled away by Vegeta. "Don't touch the bed or them, got that?" I nodded fearing his tone as I looked over at the bed. I noticed that Piccolo's eyes were closing again. They weren't their normal color they where blood red and glowing in the dark cave.

"What's wrong with them?" I asked looking up at Vegeta as the phone went off again and got ignored again at least by Vegeta and I.

"They mated Goten, until they both wake up on their own, don't go near them" he said I noticed that he was looking at Trunks who was talking on Gohan's cell phone.

"Sorry Chichi I can't wake Gohan. He just got here and crashed on couch, he must have had a long night with Videl" I heard him say into the phone then pale. His wide eyes tune to look at Vegeta silently begging for help from the man.

"I know for a fact that he wasn't with Videl since she's here saying Gohan sent her a text saying that he was babysitting Goten" we heard from the phone. I sighed knowing that my mom was screaming at Trunks. She was not in a good mood. We heard a faint whimper coming from the bed. Looking over I noticed that Gohan held a look of fear on his face as he clung to Piccolo. I felt bad for my brother. Even now he was suffering from our mother. I took the phone from Trunks.

"Stop it mom. Stop yelling at everyone because you didn't get your way. Stop hurting Gohan! He suffered enough from the both of you. Just let him be happy for once." I snapped back at her hearing both her and Videl gasp. Great...they were on speaker phone.

"Goten what's gotten into you. You know better than to cover up your brother's lies." I felt the tears in my eyes. "You know how depressed Gohan is Goten. You need to tell me where he is so we can get him help." I looked back at the bed. Piccolo held Gohan to him, calming my brother down.

"He already has the help he needs. I know you beat him mom. I know that Gohan's gay and I know how much you hate him for what happened in the fight with Cell. I listened to it for years mom and it's stopping now. If you can't handle the way Gohan lives his life then pack your stuff and leave." I said into the phone before hanging up and turning the phone off. I knew I was shaking and the tears were flowing. I knew about it but I never stood up to stop my brother from getting hurt. Thinking about it I might have made it worse for him. I couldn't really remember anytime were I didn't see Gohan wearing a shirt on. Looking over him know I could see so many scars covering his back. I knew there would be more on his chest.

I left the phone on the pile of clothes before heading outside. I wanted to hit something so that I wouldn't have to deal with having to control my anger when I saw mom again. "Goten wait up" I heard Trunks call out as he run up from behind. "Goten what's going on?" I wish I could answer his question. I really wish I could but I didn't know that much about what's going on between mom and Gohan.

"All I know is what I said over the phone to mom. I wanted to talk to Gohan about it before I said anything to someone about it" I said before I punched the tree, cracking it. I sank to my knees.

"Don't blame yourself kid, Gohan spoke up about it once. I believed him and so did Piccolo but Bulma ended up believing Chichi so nothing was done to really protect him. Piccolo left Earth for the last three years so he could figure some things out before he came back to Gohan, while your brother did the only thing he could do, protect you. He refused to leave you alone with her even if it meant he would get beaten, poison and left half dead." I blinked looking up at Vegeta not believing what I heard. Gohan chose to take this hellish treatment to protect me. I wasn't the one mom hated. She never hurt me but shown love to me. I wanted to cry and yell at Gohan for being stupid for staying around mom.

"Then why didn't you drag him from the house. Why did you leave him there to get hurt?" I asked nearly scream in anger at him for letting Gohan get hurt.

"I watched your brother grow up. I watched him fight on the battle fields for years. I know for a fact that if I tried to drag him from there he would fight me to stay and he would win. We all thought Goku was nuts when Goku said Gohan was the only one who could fight Cell and win; and during the battle the whole team saw what Goku talking about. We all knew that Gohan had hidden power locked behind his emotions. We saw what happened when that line got crossed. None of us could fight him and win. The only one who stood a chance to take Gohan away from that place is Piccolo" I sighed listening to Vegeta. The man wasn't known for talking but he must care about Gohan if he said this much about any of it.

We sat in silence in the clearing waiting for the pair to wake up. I think we all had questions to ask them about what had happened over the last three years. I felt myself being pulled down to my side and ending laying on my side with my head on Trunks' lap. I let my eyes fall shut, and drifted off to sleep as we waited.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven: Videl's P.O.V.

Here I was, at Gohan's house, left alone with his mother. I came over so I could spend the night with him, cuddling into him as we watch a movie after he put his kid brother to bed. I had plans for us last night and he wasn't here nor was his kid brother, just his mother. We never saw eye to eye every time we met over the past week. We spent all night trying to call his cell phone to find out where he went and why. It wasn't till the mid morning that there was an answer on his phone. Chichi hit the speaker button.

"Hello?" it wasn't Gohan's voice. I was starting to fear the worse for him now.

"Trunks put Gohan on the phone wake him if you have to I want to speak with him now!" I flinched at her cold, angry tone. I thought back to all the times during the week all the times he showed up to save my life. It was kind of hard not to fall in love with a man like that. I felt like Mary-Jane in the spider man comics only I knew who it was under the mask of my super hero

"Sorry Chichi I can't wake Gohan. He just got here and crashed on couch, he must have had a long night with Videl" I managed not to gasp or yell at the person at the other end of the line. How could Gohan lie about being with me during the night when he wasn't?

"I know for a fact that he wasn't with Videl since she's here, saying Gohan sent her a text saying that he was babysitting Goten" I flinched covering my ears as she shouted at the phone. I wanted to say something to her about the yelling but the look on her face made me stop before I could open my mouth.

"Stop it mom. Stop yelling at everyone because you didn't get your way. Stop hurting Gohan! He suffered enough from the both of you. Just let him be happy for once." We gasped, hearing Goten snap back at her. He must have heard Chichi through the phone even though it was Trunks we were talking to a moment ago. The shook on Chi-chi's face was priceless, making me want to laugh at it.

"Goten what's gotten into you. You know better than to cover up your brother's lies. You know how depressed Gohan is Goten. You need to tell me where he is so we can get him help." I didn't know Gohan was depressed he never seem sad at school. One of the girls would have seen it by now. There was always someone watching him. He was hot, smart, caring, not to mention he was the living definition of tall, dark and handsome. I noticed that she couldn't yell at the young boy that was standing up to her, had brought tears to her eyes.

"He already has the help he needs. I know you beat him mom. I know that Gohan's gay and I know how much you hate him for what happened in the fight with Cell. I listened to it for years mom and it's stopping now. If you can't handle the way Gohan lives his life then pack your stuff and leave." The line went dead on us. Goten had sounded cold and angry with the woman. I couldn't believe what the boy said before hanging up. It made scents now why Gohan never made any moves of the girls at school even though most of them has given him tons of chances to. We just thought he was just too naive from growing up in the country to get all the hints that where being thrown at him.

I stood up and walked outside needing from fresh air and to get away from the woman. If she really did beat on Gohan why didn't he stop her? He was stronger than her; I know that for a fact. I watched him crush guns like they were pop cans and yet he couldn't stand up to his own mother to keep her from hurting him. I needed answers and that meant finding Gohan to get them. I took to the sky; glad that I got Gohan to teach me how to do this the other day. I had no idea where to start looking but I needed to just get away from that house and Chichi.

As I flew I noticed a small man flying with a blond woman heading further over the forest. I fallowed behind them I noticed them heading for a clearing up ahead. I landed in the forested and walked towards the clearing they landed in. I hid behind a nearby tree that let me see into the clear that was still in the woods. In the clearing was the man and the woman, a guy with his long hair styled up in spikes on his head, along with two kids, one of them begin Goten. I couldn't help the shock it was to see the boy curled up beside the other boy with his head in the lavender hair boy's lap. I managed not to gasp as two men and a china doll landed in the clearing. Okay so the doll didn't land but it was freaky to see.

"Want to tell us what the hell is going on Vegeta? What the hell happened to Gohan and Piccolo?" the tall black hair man asked grabbing the smaller man with the spiky hair by the collar.

"Let go of me fool, I did nothing to them, they chose this themselves" he said coldly back. I didn't know what they were talking about just that it had something to do with Gohan.

"I don't see Piccolo or Gohan being the type to kill themselves." The short man said watching the two men glaring at each other.

"I wouldn't that's for sure" a rough voice said. I look over towards the waterfall and manage not to scream or make a sound seeing a very tall green man with pointed ears walking towards the group. I couldn't take my eyes of him. There was something about him that wouldn't let me take my eyes off him not matter how much he scares me.

"Piccolo your awake...does that mean Gohan's awake now too?" I blinked and looked back at Goten who was sitting up now watching the man. He nodded and the boy ran towards the waterfall and went behind it. I'm guessing there's a cave behind it. A moment later the boy came back out with Gohan fallowing behind him. I wanted to gasp seeing him. I never seen him in anything outside the high school outfit that he wore or the saiyan man outfit but seeing him in jeans and a tight black long sleeve shirt took my breath away. He looked really good. I never noticed it till he stood next to the tall green guy, how feminine he look, how much of a submissive nature he had to him. I gasped, I couldn't help it. Their eyes snapped to where I was. I saw the pain in Gohan's eyes as he looked away from me the second our eyes locked.

"Come out Videl, we know your there" he said like nothing was wrong yet he turned his back to me walked over to the lake, picking up a rock to skip across its surface. I walked into the clearing getting a glare from them but not caring at the moment. Gohan's pain hurt me to see it. I want to pull him into my arms and telling everything is going to be fine. I didn't get past the forest edge before I couldn't bring myself to move any closer.

"Someone mind telling me what the hell is going on and why we still can't sense Piccolo and Gohan?" the bald man with three eyes asked. I shivered creep out by that fact he had three eyes. No one spoke of moved after that. Gohan sighed, sounding almost sad. Maybe Chichi was right about Gohan being depressed.

"Tell a soul about this Videl and I swear I'll kill you myself, got it?" Gohan asked coldly not even bothered to look at me or anyone.

"I-I won't tell anyone, p-promise" I manage to say but unable to keep the fear out of it.

"Hey Gohan since you and Piccolo are mates now does that mean you two are married?" Goten asked happily. I blinked looking down at the boy who was watching his brother warmly. It didn't faze him that Gohan was with another man. I still couldn't believe it and from the looks of most of the others in the group they didn't believe it either.

"In a way yes but it's not recognised in the eyes of others outside of the Z-team. They won't see it as a marriage unless they're from another planet." Gohan said softly. I flinched. I didn't know what he was talking about really but I didn't see him as a married man.

"Wait, back up a step...what do you mean mates? As in lovers?" the man with the short black hair asked sounding creep out by the thought of it as much as I was. I was glad I didn't want to be the only one put off by it.

"More than that, it a bond between their souls. They can hear each other's thoughts, share energy and emotion between them; they know the other's physical state. When one dies, the other will fallow. There is no way to break the bond between them." The short man growled out. I felt weak and dizzy at the same time, looking between the tall green man and Gohan trying to see what they said was a lie. I didn't see what I was looking for. I wasn't the only one feeling dizzy and weak and was glad when the short man fainted. I sat on the ground just encase I lost it like the man did.

"That's so cool! I can't wait to go through the mating ritual" I blinked looking at the two boys who where beaming about it. I couldn't believe it, where these kids nuts or something? How could anyone be excited to be connected to another like that.

"Forget about it Trunks, there's a good chance that it'll kill you instead of binding you to someone" Gohan said. I guess he didn't believe that he was alive. I blinked watching him trying to come to terms with things.

"What do you mean it'll kill the boy, you two went through it and didn't die" I point out and his flinched. He didn't relax but then how could he? I was an outsider to the group from the looks of things and it made Gohan uneasy by me being here.

"Because either way it was going bring me peace by going through it. I would either die and be free from this hell or stay in hell and be with the one I love." I flinch hearing Gohan say it. I knew now that he could never love me the way I love him. I didn't know what to say back. Looking into his eyes I saw how deep his misery ran though out his soul, along with sparks of blue in his eyes. I watched the green man pull Gohan to him and whisper something to him the whole time glaring at me. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice that the others looked ready to fight before relaxing a little.

"Look girl, go home and forget about what you saw here and live your life in peace." The woman said to me. I looked over at her blinking.

"Excuse me?"I didn't know what she was getting at.

"Gohan is powerful, cunning and a deadly warrior. You being here makes him nervous, you digging for information from him doesn't help. Sooner or later what little control he has left on his powers will snap and he'll fight again and he'll kill. Piccolo use to be the king of demons for a reason, being mated, that reason will also affect Gohan. Not to mention your human like his mother and in a lot of ways you're just like her. Do yourself a favour and us, just walk away from him and don't look back" She said coldly to me as her eyes stayed on the pair before us. I jumped felling a hand on my shoulder. I looked to see Goten.

"Please go Videl...just for now... Gohan has some things to work out and you being here doesn't help him to do that." I sighed looking at the boy knowing he was right. I got up and took to the sky leaving the clearing not knowing if Gohan was going to be alright out not.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve: Gohan's POV**

I'm not going to lie it was awkward when I was getting dressed to have Goten walk into the cave just after Piccolo walked out. I still felt dizzy and tired wanting to curl back up on the bed and sleep but knowing Goten and the others wouldn't let me. It also bugged me when it was Videl who stepped out of the woods. I could smell my mother on her. It wasn't hard to figure out that she had gone to the house determined to spent time with me causing 'mom' to know that I had lied to her.

I didn't fully listen to the conversation; my mind was racing of what Chichi was going to do to me when I got home or what she would do if she knew that I let it slip to Goten that I was gay. It didn't help that I didn't want to talk to any of them about my personal life besides Piccolo, least of all Videl. I couldn't stop it from getting under my skin when she asked about the survivability of the ritual. She didn't need to know about the poison, the drawing of blood or the sex. The kids didn't need to hear about it yet, if at all. I couldn't stop the anger bubbling up; she was so much like chichi with the same demanding tone and attitude that wanted everyone to bow to her as if she was a god.

I couldn't help the surprise I felt when I felt Piccolo pull me to him. "Calm down before you attract more attention from her then you already have" I heard him whisper in my ear. I nodded weakly against him forcing myself to calm down but I couldn't relax. Not with her around or with Goten around, both for different reasons. I felt half my tension melt away once Videl took to the sky and left. I pulled back from Piccolo.

"Goten, stay with Vegeta or Piccolo but do not, I repeat, do not fallow me...I have something to take care of." I said, only to get a growl from both Piccolo and Vegeta. I guess they figured out I was going to go back to the house. I was going to pack stuff for myself at Goten and get out of there. I couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't endure the beatings, now that I had the only thing I've wanted my whole life, Piccolo. "I have to go back before she finds out that Goten knows about this, she'll kill him if she learns that he knows about this Piccolo." I shot back at my mate. I could see the shock in his eyes and understanding of why I had to go back to face her.

"She already knows that I know. I told her I was sick of her hurting you, that I knew you we're gay" I couldn't breathe as fear gripped my heart as I turned to look at my brother. "You and Piccolo where still asleep and Trunks answered your phone, it was mom. She demanded that we wake you up but Vegeta told us not to touch the bed so I took the phone and yelled at mom to stop it all and that I knew so you two could stop trying to hid things from me. I didn't say where we were though..." He said with a pout and hid behind Trunks. He told Chichi. He put himself in danger by telling her that.

"Goten I'm not mad at you but you have to understand, you can't see mom again, no matter what happens. She'll hurt you and everything I've endured through will be for nothing. I promised Dad to protect you and I can't do that if you go back to her. Promise me that you won't go back to the house" I asked him. I was kneeling in front of him holding him by the shoulders. I was glad that he knew and didn't care about it that he still saw me as his brother.

"I promise Gohan but only if you promise to come back" he said looking up at me with tears in his eyes. I pulled him in to my arms. I heard Piccolo and Vegeta fill the others in on what was going on between me and Chichi.

"I swear to you Goten that I'll come back. Just stay with Piccolo or Vegeta alright and don't listen to anyone but them" I said worried that Chichi had already talked to Bulma about what Goten had told her and that she would need to see the boy to explain things to him and calm him down. I liked Bulma and she's a good person, she just sighed with the wrong side during all this mess.

"You know what she'll do to you if you go back there don't you Gohan?" I nodded back to 18. Either she was going to kill me or I was going to kill her. I let go of Goten and stood up. Before anyone could say anything I teleported back to the house I grew up in.

From the outside it looked peaceful, calm and loving. It reminded me of dad. My heart clenched. I wonder, how he was going to take the news of all this. I couldn't wait to see him again and yet I was dreading it. I wasn't sure if I could handle seeing the disappointment and rejection in his eyes for how I turned out. With a sigh, I walked towards the house to face Chichi one last time.

"Do you know what you've done?" her voice was cold and venomous. She was standing the kitchen looking mad as hell. The house was already trashed. "Where is your brother? You better have brought him home with you and way from those perverse bastards that your father called friends" I knew she was always crazy but she was losing it even for her. I clenched my hands tightly, trying to keep it together, not wanting to show how much that irritated me. Even if the team couldn't accept my sexual preference, they were still a hell of a lot better than she ever was to me over the last seven years.

"He's safe, that's all you need to know" I said stiffly back to her. My hands felt wet, either they where sweaty or my nails had dig in so much that they broke through the skin. I didn't care. Something was about to happen, I could feel it in the energy in the room. It was thick, charged and ready to unleash its furry. I watch her walked up to me. I hadn't really notice how small she really was till now or how truly thin she was. She already had the developing lines of winkles setting in, even under her makeup that she would always be wearing now.

"Tell me where my son is, **now! **Gohan." she was on the verge of losing it.

"He's safe and in a place where you can't get to him Chichi; where you can't kill him for figuring things out on his own." I growled out. My right wrist was throbbing along with the mark on the base of my neck, it wasn't painful just that it was trying to get my attention that was focused on watching what Chichi would do. I saw the slap coming but didn't move to stop it or get out of its way. It stung slightly but nothing else.

"I wonder how trilled dad was when he got home from Namek to learn that his wife was sleeping with another man. I guess pretty trilled, since you had another lover you could abuse. Know what Dad told me in the time chamber before our fight with Cell? He told me how happy he was going to be after the Cell games, he was going to send you on your way to your lover, get his house back to himself and move on with his life, say perhaps with Vegeta." I hissed out at her. I knew it was a bad idea to provoke her but I didn't care. I wanted her to attack me with the intent to kill me. I would give me a reason to kill her and not fell back about why I had to kill her.

I hissed when I felt two sharp thin objects pierced the flesh of my leg. I knew that whatever she injected me with, wouldn't be a good thing. I grabbed her wrist went she tried to stab me. I wanted to crush her wrist make her drop the weapon but I couldn't make my grip go tight enough to break the bones. She laughed darkly.

"How long do you think you can last having that serum-thing that Bulma made, that saiyan's are allergic too, combine with the venom of a water moccasin?" she asked. Pain started at the injection site and started to spread though my leg. I started to feel sick to my stomach yet I managed to somehow hold myself in place. For once I was praying to hear Piccolo's growl in the back of my mind, letting me know that he had heard what happened.

Silence

I was scared now. No one would really come looking for me till tonight, I doubt I'll be alive when they came looking. She pulled her wrist free from my weakening grip; trying again to put the knife in my chest. I manage to get out of the way this time, leaning against a wall to keep from falling. I was having a hard time keeping myself upright. I was starting to see doubles of everything. I slid down the wall. He laugher sounded crazed and distant. I felt her hand in my hair pulling my hair up and titling it to face more towards the roof.

"You really should have gone on that date last night Gohan, it would have spared your life. Would have spared that green skin demon spawn from pain of having to burry you" she hissed out. Before I could even process what she said. Her lips where pressed against mine. I felt sickened from it as she forced her tongue into my mouth, moaning into it. I couldn't fight her off me, nor would I respond to her kiss. _**'Piccolo...help...'**_ I wasn't sure if he could hear me. All I knew was the pain and numbness that encompassed my body and the urge to be sick from having my mother kiss me. I felt her pulling back from the kiss.

I would have smiled at the frustrated look she gave me when I didn't kiss her back if it wasn't for her embedding the knife in my chest. It only hurt for a moment. I couldn't keep my eyes from closing or the warm nothingness that blanked me. I fought the darkness to stay back as I pulled the knife from my chest. I don't know where I found the strength to lift the knife or how I through it, just that I had thrown it, causing it to embed itself between her eyes. I smiled even as I coughed up blood. Goten would be safe from her and I got one night of heaven before this. Even as the dark closed in on me, it felt bitter sweet. Chichi was dead and could hurt me anymore but I was being pulled away from Piccolo after what we just survived to be together. _**'I'm sorry my dark king...'**_

_**The End**_

**Author's Note:** Sorry this chapter took so long getting up, work gave me crazy hours and didn't get much sleep as I said in my one shot Valentine's day fanfic; Hell Frozen Valentine. Thank you all for your support and reviews, keep writing them, they help keep the story going. I know you all hate the cliff hanger there but the story will continue in the next story I write: Needing Truth.


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